Irony Is A Fucked Up Mistress | By : RuShin Category: Comics > Johnny the Homicidal Maniac Views: 1608 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Chapter Seven - Physical Contact?
Zim leapt up from his crash landing behind the cash counter, ignoring the screaming clerk as what remained of his spider legs pierced the fake wood and he crouched dangerously on the counter top.
He swept his gaze quickly over the destroyed store, eyes mere crimson slits, looking for his enemy. All he saw was Dib blinking at him from a chip aisle. He let out a rage filled yell and hopped off the counter, stumbling a bit. He was pissed. Beyond pissed, and his adrenaline was pumping but that didn’t mean his body was at one hundred percent. He glared at his companion and pointed dramatically. “Where did that bastard go?!” He was swaying ever so slightly, his legs unsteady.
Seeing how unsteady Zim was, Dib rushed to his companion’s side, grabbing the alien before it fell. “He got away. I think you really did a number on him, too. He kinda had a weird hobble when he left.”
He wilted a bit, leaning on Dib’s shoulder. He was still tense and his eyes kept scouting the room. There would be time for him to sulk over his wounds later. “Dammit! What about the other one?” He turned expectantly to the bespectacled man that was supporting part of his weight.
Dib blinked. Second one? Was Zim seeing double or something? The blue haired man must have hit him really hard with that mechanical leg or something. He looked at Zim with a confused expression, “He…got away!” What else was he to say? When in doubt, repeat yourself.
The alien cursed under his breath, his whole body tensing with anger before he completely melted. Most off his weight was now on Dib. He sighed. “Ah well. They must have been frightened of the mighty Zim!” He looked up at Dib seriously. “I think we have our first suspect for those Boogiedy Wooggiedy…” He twirled his hand searching for the conclusion of his sentence. “Wu thingy murders.”
He coughed furiously. He blinked up at Dib blearily. “Zim is tired and wants to go home.”
“Alright, we’re on our way. Just hold on,” he soothed. He picked Zim up and carried him to the car. He would have to call the Chief to tell him what happened and that they wouldn’t be able to make the meeting. Zim needed help immediately.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
As the blaring light faded away, and their feet touched the wood floor of Johnny’s house, Edgar released Nny’s ear and backed away. With one strong flap of his wings, he lifted off the ground to get a little more distance from the maniac.
He rubbed his ear, growling low in his throat. “What the fuck were you thinking?! I almost had him!” He stalked towards the angel angrily raising his blade high to strike; he winced, grabbing his chest in pain. “Shit.” He glared at the other, and then blinked. He pointed at the man’s chest. “Weren’t you stabbed?” The wound was completely gone, even the hole in the shirt had disappeared.
“You didn’t look like you had him,” Edgar replied stoically. He followed Johnny’s gaze to his chest before meeting his eyes once again. “I’m an angel. Any injury hurts, of course, but it causes no damage. No blood or bodily fluids of any kind.” He swooped down, getting mere inches from the other’s face and smiling flirtatiously. “It’s as if I’m perfect for you, isn’t it?”
His eyes widened and he leaned back, away from the other’s face confusedly. He scowled, forcing his face to stay the same temperature. “No one is perfect for me, least of all you.” His eyes were focused on the other’s chest, unable to meet the man’s eyes. He flexed his hand, wanting to test this new bit of information, but a sharp pain flew up his arm. He glanced down. He had forgotten about the cut on his palm.
Remembering one pain led to the recognition of all the others and he groaned. His head was pounding, and every muscle ached from being thrown into things. Not to mention his surely broken ribs and wrist. He took a deep breath, as if about to sigh, and broke into a coughing fit. Flecks of blood stained his lips.
He glared at the angel. Cradling himself, he slowly moved away from his close proximity. “I don’t feel dealing with you right now.”
He leaned away and examined Nny’s injuries from a distance. He knew he could heal him, but the procedure…well; he just didn’t want to have to do it. Then again, he was supposed to help Johnny out in any situation. He decided to let him choose. “I could heal your wounds, but…well, it’s just –” he stuttered uncomfortably, really, really, really not wanting to go on. “—it involves…emotions.” He said the last word with obvious reluctance.
He stared at the other a moment. “You can heal people?” He considered for a moment before narrowing his eyes suspiciously. Emotions weren’t bad, in Johnny’s opinion. Some were useful, like anger. Others were detrimental like sadness. Both were emotions he knew well, but other feelings only came at rare moments and made him feel awkward. Like that happy, content feeling he got when Edgar touched him. He frowned. “What kind of emotions?”
Edgar looked away and bit his lip, “The happy, content emotions you seem to get whenever I touch you.” He directed his gaze to the floor. “And the execution…consists of…physical contact.”
He took a step back, as if the other might jump him at any second. This was sounding worse and worse. “…what kind of physical contact?”
This was getting harder and harder to explain without feeling really awkward. He sighed heavily and turned to Nny. “Okay. Listen closely, because I’m only going to explain this bluntly and unpleasantly once.” He took a deep breath, “To properly heal any severe wounds like the ones you possess, an angel must feel sympathy for the one he or she is healing. The emotion must then be used to fuel the healing process by being channeled into the wounded person’s body via equally emotional contact, in other words, I have to kiss you.” He threw out his hands towards Johnny, waving them about in an almost frantic gesture. “Not on the mouth or anything!! Just the forehead!! Oh, god. Nevermind! Forget I mentioned it!”
Johnny’s eyes widened. He was stunned and horrified. “You have to…kiss…me?” His face was blank for a moment before an expression that appeared to be filled with pain, disgust and horror formed on his features. “I…I…” He shook his head and stood straighter, despite the pain that rolled over him like a wave. “No way in hell. Your…your lips aren’t coming anywhere close to me. I’m fine anyway.” He turned and walked into the living room without another word.
Edgar released the breath he just realized he was holding. Thank god. He REALLY didn’t want to go through with such nonsense. He knew he had to do whatever Johnny said, but if Nny didn’t want something, he didn’t have to comply…right? “Fine by me.”
Authors’ Notes:
Whew. Sorry that the last two chapters were so short, but from here on out the story’s going to pick up the pace a bit. You’ll get to see a little more into Dib and Zim’s relationship in the next chapter, which is turning out to be really long. o_o But oh well. XD And don’t worry about Nny, he’ll get better. ;P I promise! *giggles insanely* Ru, over and out!
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