Irony Is A Fucked Up Mistress | By : RuShin Category: Comics > Johnny the Homicidal Maniac Views: 1607 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Chapter Six- Gobstoppers Are Deadly
Edgar winced as the horrible sound of cracking bone filled the room and Nny crashed into the candy stand beside him. He was too grossed out by what had occurred to see if the man was alright. Broken bones made him very ill. But mere seconds passed by and the angel's attention was redirected to the floor.
"Hey!" He brightened up, "Gobstoppers!!" He reached down and grabbed a hand full of the little jawbreakers, not even noticing the alien appendage that pierced the wall where his head used to be. He straightened back up and found another section of wall near the back to lean against, munching happily on his candy.
Nny lay there amongst the scattered candy. He clutched at his chest, taking shallow breaths. He was suddenly aware that he no longer had his knife or the mechanical arm. He sat up, blood filling his mouth from where he was biting his tongue to keep himself from crying out. He took another breath, it was shaky and painful. He was betting his broken ribs had nicked his lung. Something glittered in his peripheral vision and he glanced that way.
Looking towards the shiny, he realized that it was the mechanical arm that he was using earlier. He pushed up from the ground, arms unsteady. His battle rush was beginning to simmer down, and he could feel every ache of his muscles and the steady pain in his chest. He was wavering, but one glance at the alien showed that he wasn't doing much better. He stood and stumbled towards the object embedded in the wall near the angel.
Zim was breathing heavily and his status screen appeared in his vision like a computer screen only he could see. It was flashing "heavy damage, consider fleeing." He growled lightly. Even his superior body could not heal the raw lashes that littered his body while attempting to stem the flow of oil and blood from his wounded Pak arm. Bleed to death internally or outwardly? Not choices he was fond of. He needed to end this soon so that he could go repair himself manually. He stalked toward the stumbling human. His stride was steady, though a tremor ran through him and magenta eyes dulled with pain.
He didn't even see the small projectile until it smacked him straight in the eye.
"GAH!" He stumbled backwards, clasping his hand over his eye. He squinted down at the floor to see the offending weapon. He blinked. Was that a Gobstopper? He glared--well, half glared. It was a little hard to glare effectively with only one eye open. The scrape of shoes against tile caught his attention and he looked back up sharply.
As soon as the impromptu weapon struck the alien, his fingers grasped the hilt of the blade he had lost earlier. He had made this lucky discovery because he had stumbled to the floor and it had been just lying there a few inches from his face. So, of course, what better idea than to throw a hard, sugary sweet into your opponents eye as a distraction? His logic was flawless; no one could refute such genius!
Even if they could, it didn't matter. He got the knife and he was just happy that he didn't have to walk the rest of the way to the mechanical arm.
After he regained his feet, he mustered up enough strength to run towards the alien. If its defenses were down, perhaps he could give that finishing blow. Hey, couldn't blame a humble, homicidal maniac for hoping.
His plans came crashing down around him though as his vision blurred and he stumbled. By the time he looked back up from his feet, the alien was glaring at him. So much for distractions and the element of the surprise. It was now or never time.
He raised his arm high before plunging downward, aiming for where he hoped the alien’s jugular vein resided.
Zim caught the man's wrist just in time, the blade barely an inch from his throat. He twisted the man's hand sharply, a small "pop" was heard. A warning that given anymore pressure, the wrist would break. The blade dropped from the man's wrist...and tore through the fabric of Zim's skirt on it way down.
The ominous rip echoed through sudden silence of the room, like a bomb exploding in the depths of space. Zim's face contorted, almost as if in slow motion, as a gasp tore from his throat. The emotions were thus: horror, disbelief, almost physical pain and then blankness. It was like a cheerleader breaking a nail, only much more deadly.
He lowered his head, face hidden from view. "Do you know..." His grip tightened on the maniac's wrist. "how...frickin' long it took me..." He looked back up into the man's gaze, eyes crazed as his voice rose to a deafening volume. "TO FIND THAT EXACT SHADE OF PINK, YOU BITCH?!"
There was a sickening sound as the bone of Nny's wrist suddenly snapped. He cried out, trying to rip the other's hand off of him. He finally broke free, stumbling backwards, his mind an endless chant of "oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!" He needed to think of something quick, and with one useless hand, his options had just grown a lot slimmer.
Zim stooped down and plucked the knife from the floor with a cold and calculated movement. He twirled the blade before hovering over the other's fallen body. "Any last words, Earth-Monkey?" His voice was dark and final.
Nny's eyes widened a bit before narrowing just as quickly. He smirked. "Nope." He feigned a side roll, and then kicked upwards with as much speed as the alien made to stab him. His foot connected with the blunt side of the blade, sending it flying across the room. He then tackled the Irken, straddling him and putting his forearm to good use by pushing it into the alien's throat, cutting off its air supply.
The knife went sailing through the air. The angel had no warning before he found himself impaled through the chest by a very familiar looking blade. His eyes widened in shock and horror. A red liquid covered the front of his shirt...but it wasn't blood. Angels didn't bleed. No, this was a different yet still treasured substance. Edgar glared down at his now-bottomless Fiz Wiz cup that the knife had just cut through on its way into his torso. The only thing he could say sprang to mind in an instant. "Ah, dammit."
He barely noticed Johnny be thrown into the wall beside him, nor did he notice the maniac dispassionately rip the blade from Edgar's chest to use in the still on-going fight. His irritation with the whole ordeal grew. One last glance at the wasted Fiz Wiz covering his shirt and the floor set him off.
"Alright! This has gone far enough!!" He growled as he lunged towards the combatants. He swooped into the middle of the two and shoved them both backwards with one strong swipe of his wings. They could be physical when he needed them to be.
The alien had landed somewhere behind the counter, according to the frightened scream that came from the cashier, but he didn't have time to care. Grabbing Johnny by the ear, Edgar dragged him out of the store. "Come on! We're getting out of here!" He pushed the other into an abandoned alley so he could transport them back to house 777 without being seen. So much for a normal outing to the 24/7.
Authors’ Notes-
Yay! Fight scenes make Ru very happy. Even if she sucks at them. XD Who here thinks that we’re going to have a very angry alien and homicidal maniac in the next chapter? ::raises hand:: Neither of them are going to like having their fight interrupted. Pssh, babies. XD
Yes, yes. I realize that it’s too early for an update. But y’know. I’m sick. And bored. So, I decided to post something. Besides, the next chapter’s rather short. D:
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