Episodes Of Minneapolis: Lucy Van Pelt

BY : JaxRhapsody
Category: Comics > Peanuts
Dragon prints: 217
Disclaimer: I'm obviously not the ghost of, or related to Charles Shultz, nor enherited from him; The Peanuts. There's no monetary gain on what I obviously don't own, or contracted, and generally unrelated to.

The next day, the girls were hanging at the mall, Patty was thinking about what happened with Charlie, and whether she should say something, zoned out from the conversation.

“Hey Patty, are you listening,” Lucy snapped her fingers.


“We’re talking about the next big prank on Charlie, catch up,” Lucy explained.

“Yeah, or were you daydreaming about being his girlfriend and making out with him,” Frieda teased.

“So, I’m thinking of throwing a party and tricking him to come, and one of us convinces him we want to have sex, then once we’re naked, we toss him out of the room naked,” Violet guffawed, “wouldn’t that be hilarious?!”

“I don’t think he trust us enough to fall for that,” Patty mused, “besides, I don’t think we should do something that bad… we should leave him alone for a while.”

“For what?! We need to make sure he knows how worthless he his,” Lucy exclaimed.

“What if he like, committed suicide?”

They looked at her confused.

“He’s a piece of shit, but I know he’s not that broken, I’ve known the guy for years,” Lucy said.

“So what if he did, He’d be doing the world a service,” Violet added.

“He’s a waste of space, Patty,” Frieda added.

“After class yesterday… I saw… saw him bleeding. He’s cutting himself, and it’s all our fault! Please stop.”

They looked at her, and looked at each other.

“Well, that is serious, indeed. Girls, maybe we should just leave him alone, but only for a few days,” Lucy said.

“We’ll give your boyfriend a break, happy now,” Frieda asked.

“I guess that’s better than nothing. I’m getting a refill,” she got up.

“Are you serious, Lucy,” Frieda wondered.

“Hell no! It gives me an even better idea; it won’t be grand, but it’ll really sock it to him,” she laughed.

“What, what is it,” Violet got excited.

“Now we can’t tell Patty for obvious reasons, but I’m going to…”


Monday, Lucy put her plan in motion to really get Charlie good, convincing Lydia to hand him her gift at their table at lunch, watching from a safe distance.

“What are you all snickering about,” Patty asked.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” Frieda replied.

“No, no, no, there’s a reason,” she furrowed her brow.

“We just saw Lydia giving Charlie a note, maybe she likes him, losers do stick together,” Lucy said.

“Oh… you think it was a love letter?”

“Think somebody is going to take your man from you,” Violet teased.

“He’s not my man!”

“Well then, just enjoy the show,” Lucy smiled triumphantly.

“Hey Charlie, I think you have a secret admirer, I’m so curious, it would be so good for you.”

“Open it Chuck,” Peppermint Patty demanded.

“Aye, Franklin,” Lamar nudged him, “Charlie got a love letter, lets hear this.”

“Good going, my guy,” Franklin said.

“Let me open it first,” Charlie replied.

He read; It seems you’ve been really depressed lately, and that hurts to watch, I care about you Charlie Brown and don’t want to see you this way. So I want to help you feel better and I’m the only girl that can do it for you. I can’t stand to see you this way, so I have given you something to help. See next page. Charlie flipped the page over, fear washed over him; I give you a life time supply to just get it over with, sincerely hate you, Lucy Van Pelt. Taped to the second page was a single razor blade.

They could see the life drain from his face when he dropped the letter.

“Charlie, oh my god… I didn’t know! I thought it was a real love letter,” Lydia cried.

“That bitch,” Linus slammed his fist on the table.

“It’s not your fault, Lydia,” Marcie said.

“It’s my sisters fault!”

“I didn’t know it was a trick!”

“Why would you trust anything Lucy would give you for Charlie,” Lamar asked.

“She said it was from Patty, she liked him and was afraid to say anything. She’s usually nicer to Charlie, I thought it was real.”

“And she wonders why I’ll never date her!”

“That’s one cold bitch,” Franklin said.

“She’s a fucking cunt,” Patricia added.

“Patty? Patty,” Charlie yelled, looking around.

The clique was laughing and cackling watching it all go down, except Patty, her eyes were wide, mouth agape, as Charlie stared their way with the others.

“Okay… that was too far,” Lamar claimed, “we’re taking this to the principal, now.”

Charlie mustered enough strength to walk to their table.

“Don’t go too crazy, Charles,” Marcie yelled.

“Oh shit, here he comes,” Violet laughed.

“Well, well, well, as I live and breath, did Charlie Brown finally get a backbone,” Lucy smiled

“Shut the fuck up! You went to far, you stupid bitch, you… you… cunt! I’m sick of you always hell-bent on making me miserable, and this was the last straw!”

“I’m shaking,” she feigned fear.

“And you! Was that all a setup the other day, how could you tell her what you saw?!”

“It wasn’t like that!”

“Yeah right, you were just looking for the next prank, Patty, I almost thought you cared!”

“I do! I swear, I was trying to help you!”

“Not hearing it! All of you are trash, leave me the fuck alone! You’re all going to pay for this,” he  stomped off.

“Charlie,” Patty cried out. “Why would you do that?! You promised me!”

“And miss a golden opportunity to hit him where it really hurts?! Yeah right! Besides; you needed to be reminded of who’s side you’re supposed to be on, you’re our friend, right, so he’s the enemy. Now you don’t need to be picking sides, I picked it for you.”

“Yeah… you did. You picked yourself and your feud, over somebody who’s supposed to be your friend by using me as bait,” she started crying.

“How else were we going to get your head on straight, we did you a favor,” Violet leered.

“My heads on straight,” she wiped her tears, “it’s clear we haven’t been real friends in a long time.”

“Why else would we do this,” Frieda asked, “you’d keep crushing on him, if we didn’t do something drastic “

“Some friends you are,” she ran off.

Suddenly a voice on the p.a. system reported Lucy and Patty to the principals office.

“Well fuck,” Lucy yelled.

Patty sighed, turning towards the office. She saw Lamar and Linus walking her way.

“Why would you do that to Charlie, Patty? I know you’re my sisters friend, but I thought you were better than that,” Linus interrogated.

“I didn’t have anything to do with it!”

“Lydia said the letter was supposed to be from you!”

“I know, but I didn’t know they were going to do that. I was trying to help Charlie and get them to let off.”

“So they got the idea from something you did, what was it,” Lamar asked.

“Yeah, how the hell was that help,” Linus growled.

“I saw Friday that Charlie’s arm was… bleeding. He had cut himself, because of them.”

“Because of all if you!”

“I thought if they knew, they would stop,” she started crying again, “I told them to give him a break so he would stop doing it, they promised me they would leave him alone for a while! I didn’t want this, I didn’t want it!”

“I think she’s telling the truth, Linus. They used you, didn’t they?”

She nodded.

“Why were you trying to help Charlie, lie and I’ll sic Peppermint Patty on you,” Linus threatened.

“I’ve been trying to defend him, I think I like him, I’ve been thinking about him and I don’t want to see him hurt. I was afraid Lucy and Violet would turn on me if they knew. It doesn’t matter now how much I like him… it’s all ruined.”

“They turned on you anyway. If you’re serious, I will talk to Charlie for you, he might be forgiving, but you need to tell the principal all that shit before Lucy pins all the blame on you,” Lamar explained.

“Okay,” she ran to the office.

“You really believe that?”

“Peer pressure is a bitch. I was an outcast in my old school, I always wanted to fit in.”

The principal listened to Lucy explain the whole thing.

“Patty said she saw him cutting himself in school last week, and told us about it. I give him a hard time here and there, but I thought that was tragic, why would he do that, right? I guess he’s worse off than I thought. All I do is give the kid some tough love. She was all like; we can use that for a prank, and it just didn’t seem right, to me,” she shrugged.

Lucy sat next to Patty outside his office, glaring at her getting up, “good luck.”


“I can’t believe I got fucking suspended,” Lucy yelled incredulously, as they waited for Violets driver.

“What about Patty, she get suspended, too,” Frieda asked.

“The way she poured her heart out in there, I doubt,” she huffed.

Violet’s driver dropped her off at home, and her dad was there.


“I think somebodies in trouble,” Frieda teased.

Lucy rolled her eyes, getting out of the car. The moment she hit the door, her dad was in the kitchen, pouring what looked like bourbon in his coffee.


Linus walked in on their dad lecturing Lucy, wanting to listen in, with a big shit-eating grin, this whole thing was all that cut through his anger at her. Their dad turned his back for a moment and Linus flipped her off, just before being drug in the conversation to see how much he knew. Lucy was furious after their dad went back to work.

“He seriously only came back just to yell at me, and went back to work, and I don’t think my punishment is all that fair.”

“It’s not  you’re right.”

“Thank you, brother dear.”

“He should’ve gave you an ass whipping for what you did.”

“Why do you people care about that block-head bastard so much?!”

“Did you know Patty had a crush on him?”

“We suspected it, as much as she tried to defend him.”

“Do you not care that you really hurt Patty?! That you sacrificed your friend just to get at Charlie?!”

“She’ll come around,” she shrugged, now go make me a sandwich.”

Linus ignored her, fishing around his backpack. Lucy got up and got in his face.

“Go make me a sandwich!”

“Go fuck yourself,” he yelled twice as loud, slapping her in the face with her assignments.

A few minutes later the phone rang; Lucy answered to her dad yelling at her to turn off the tv and go to her room. She huffed up to her room, after a while heard Rerun come home, and Linus downstairs, grumbling at hearing him offer to make them snacks, and explain what happened at school.

“That’s right, I need to let Charlie know the good news,” he called him on speaker phone.

“This better be Linus,” Charlie answered.

“Yes, it’s Linus.”

“Hi Charlie,” Rerun piped up.

“And Rerun, so I have some news; Lucy got suspended for three days, and my dad chewed her out, and grounded her.”

Lucy heard Charlie laughing, “I’ll teach you to laugh at me, soon enough,” she mumbled.

“So you think she’ll be out on good behavior,” Charlie joked.

Linus laughed, “this is the Charlie I missed, man. Take this time to recover, you’ll be free of our sister for a few days.”

“You’re right, but there’s still the other three,” he sighed.

“At least you won’t see Lucy for a while… oh and-”

“I’m still pissed at her, and Patty. Pissed and upset- depressed? There’s so much I’m feeling.”

“Oh, I’m just straight up pissed at the whole thing. I want to do something, but I know Lucy will pound me. But look; Lamar and I ran in to Patty coming back from the Principals office, and she told us-”

“I really don’t want to know, she betrayed what little friendship we had… I just don’t care to discuss it.”

“It’s not like that, I promise! Please just listen!”

“I’m trying to figure out how calm down and sort through some things. I’m getting off here,” he hung up.


“What is it he needs to hear?”

“Patty didn’t have anything to do with it, our dumbass sister used her to play that dirty trick. Patty has a crush on Charlie.”

“Wow. Patty’s the nicest out of all of them… that’s sad. I thought she was one of Lucy’s best friends.”

“Not since she started liking Charlie, I guess,” Linus shrugged.

“You just had to rub it in, with that drama queen, huh,” Lucy stood at the top of the steps.

“Every time I think about that stunt you pulled  it pisses me off, all over again! You just ruined two peoples lives, for a laugh! Gah, Peppermint Patty is right; you are a cunt!”

“Don’t call me that!”

“If the tampon fits, sister dear!”

“I’m disappointed in you, Lucy,” Rerun said.


“You hurt your friend. That was wrong. I know you tease Charlie, which is also wrong, but you used somebody who cared about you, which is even worse.”

“But, Rerun, it was just… fun.”

“Would you sacrifice me for fun?”

“No, of course not, little brother!”

“I’m not so sure.”

Linus glared, “I know she’d sacrifice me.”

Lucy was stunned, she ran to her room and shut the door.

“Have her ponder on that a while.”

“I think she forgets how smart you really are,” Linus hugged him.


At school everything is as normal as it usually is.

“So… how’s your first Lucy free day been so far,” Lamar asked.

“Other than the feeling in the back of my head she’s plotting revenge, not bad. Violet and Frieda have been too busy for the most part, trying to talk with Patty to bother me too much.”

“Man… speaking of Patty…”

The bell rang.

“Ope, can’t talk, next class,” Charlie jumped up.

“C’mon, man,” Lamar sighed.

At lunch Patty sat by herself. Apparently the kill yourself letter sent in her name was too far for the student body, at least those who thought anything decent of Charlie, or pitied him. She tried to ignore the grimaced stares of his friends as they reached their table.

“I’m surprised she isn’t sitting with the other cunts,” Patricia said.

“It does seem strange,” Franklin added.

“Maybe she regrets what she did, however I’m curious why she wasn’t suspended,” Marcie wondered.

“Because she didn’t do it. They used her,” Lamar sat down.

“I find that hard to believe,” Schroeder dismissed.

“He’s right. Though she does join in on the torture, she actually doesn’t hate Charlie,” Linus sat down.

“See! Even I’ve been here long enough to pick up on a few things,” Lamar added.

“So they threw her under the bus? Actually I expect that from Lucy or Violet,” Peppermint Patty mused.

“She actually tries to defend Charlie, she told us that-”

“Shhh! Here he comes,” Linus hushed.

“Hey guys, what are we talking about?”

“That… race that was on tv, the one at Road Atlanta,” Lamar lied.

“Yeah! I can’t wait to get my license, I wanna race like that,” Patricia blurted.

Lucy toiled over as much homework as she could stand, while watching tv, otherwise bored. She tried to sneak out, but Charlie’s mom was off work that day, spending time on the garden in the front yard, she gave Lucy a nasty stare, she didn’t think Mrs. Brown had a nasty streak, and that kinda scared her, so she went back inside. She was sitting on the porch when Charlie and Linus were walking from the bus stop.

“I hope your day was shitty, Charlie Brown-eye!”

“Did you spend all day trying to come up with insults, when you have school work to do,” Linus asked.

“It was a wonderful day,” Charlie lied, “the whole school was singing; ding dong, the bitch is dead.”

“I’m not the one that should be dead… cutter!”

They both froze.

“Yeah… think I forgot how this started? Did they not tell you, brother dear; she saw he was bleeding from cutting himself.”

“He- Charlie, you…?”

“Oh yeah, all I did was use it, if she hadn’t said anything we wouldn’t have known, if he didn’t do it, none of this would’ve even happened. This is their fault, I’m suspended.

“That’s enough,” Charlie yelled.

“It’s the truth, and you know it. We’re here, because like everything else… you can’t even do that right.”

Linus snapped out of it, looking at Charlie confused, “you do that?”

“It helps.”

Linus simply hugged him tight, “go home Charlie, I’ll call you later.”

With that, Linus walked inside and didn’t say another word.

“So… how was that revelation? I mean he kept it from everybody, even his bestest friend,” she taunted. “Like the guy must be super emo or something, amirite?”

Linus just stayed quiet through her ramblings, making him something to eat, taking his backpack to his room.

“…I don’t know why you or Patty would be surprised, I mean something like that is obviously a Charlie thing to do. She begged us to give him a break, so we planned on trying to break him.”

“You… how can you be my sister… you a… raving… sociopathic… conniving… sick and twisted… royal… cunt,” smashing his bowl of ramen in her face. “What did we ever do to you, are you some sort of punishment from God?!”

Lucy tossed the bowl away, fuming, leaping at Linus on the couch, pinning him down, “are you fucking crazy?!”

“I must be… I’m related to you!”

“I’m going to rearrange your face for that,” she snarled.

Linus started pushing back, lifting her off, catching her by surprise, that he isn’t as weak as he used to be. Next thing she knew, she was on the floor, jumping up to tackle him, he held steadfast, it was then she realized, not only was he stronger, but he was getting taller, too.

“They’re going to realize that since you sold out Patty; that there is possibility that you’ll do it to them, too! Violet might be nearly as big a cunt as you, but she’s not stupid. Even if you don’t do it, they’re going to think you will!”

“Don’t call me that, you piece of shit,” she swung on him.

“It’s the truth,” he swung back, “you make everybody’s life a living hell,” he swung again, “just for your amusement,” again, “I don’t even see how anybody can trust you,” again, “you are truly,” again, “the worst human,” again, “in this city,” again, “terrorizing one of the nicest,” again, “people. I would honestly trust the Serpent Sisters before ever trusting you.”

Lucy backed away, holding her face and stomach.

“Because at least there’s honor among thieves. You are the reason he cuts himself  and that should’ve been a red flag that one; it’s your fucking fault, and two; that you should’ve assessed that maybe, just maybe you should dial it back… to zero, not make it fucking worse. It’s not or was ever tough love as you used to claim. You’re one sinister woman. I don’t want to see your face anymore, and I’d better not ever hear you even think Charlie’s name… or I’ll pound you worse. We are sick of you, Lucille! You’re an embarrassment to this family!”

Linus tries to calm down, she’s still stunned at what just happened, she starts to cry.

“Great! Now there’s a mess I have to clean up!”

“I-I’ll clean it, Linus,” she nearly whispered.

He just looked at her.

“We were friends once. I guess.. I hope… Patty can forgive me.”

“Pfftt. You’re just surprised I beat you up. You’ll be back to your old self soon enough,” he huffed.

Lucy cleaned everything up, best she could, returning to her room, without a word.

“Fuck… I need to call Charlie.”


The next day Charlie was still bothered by Lucy’s words, but Linus reassured him that she won’t mess with him anymore, after yesterday.

“I never thought you’d stoop so low as to fight a girl, your sister at that,” Marcie scolded.

“She had it coming, after what she said to Charlie. I’m not that kinda guy, you all know I’m not, I’ve never even thought of doing that… ever.”

“Was it really that worth it,” Lamar asked.

“I can’t really say the whole reason, but yeah.. because…”

“Because she again said I should kill myself, or that I even fail at that, because I cut.”

“Oh shit, you cut, Charlie,” Lamar freaked out.

“Charlie, it’s gotten that bad,” Schroeder exclaimed. “We were so oblivious.”

“I wish you had told us, you my boy,” Franklin said.

“It’s all Lucy and her cliques fault, you should’ve did that a long time ago, Linus,” Patricia said.

“We’re your friends, Charles, you can tell us anything, we care about you.”

“I’m sorry. I know you guys get tires of me sometimes.”

“This is a fresh start, dude. You got all these friends who care about you, with your try-hard ass. I know you’ll never forgive Lucy for this, but-”

“You’re right. I won’t ever forgive her, nor Frieda, Violet, or especially Patty.”

“Say the word, Chuck, I’ll deal with Patty myself,” she cracked her knuckles.

“It wasn’t her fault,” Linus blurted.

“Whadaya mean it wasn’t her fault,” Charlie asked incredulously.

“What we’ve been trying to tell you; we saw her when we came back from the office, she explained she had nothing to do it,” Lamar explained.

“You believe her,” Charlie raised an eyebrow.

“Lucy said she used her to trick you, because Patty found out you cut yourself and begged them to leave you alone,” Linus explained.

“They wanted to teach her lesson because she likes you,” Lamar added.

“She likes me…?”

“Don’t believe us, come see for yourself,” Lamar snatched him up.

He dragged Charlie over to Patty sitting by herself, she looked at him with eyes filled with sadness only he could understand.

“Now I promised you I’d tell him, here he is, now you hear her out.”


Lucy is still upset from yesterday, she’s been avoiding Linus, she finished up all her schoolwork and there is only one thing that can get her out of this funk. She hides her bruises with makeup and ran out the door.

“Go away, I’m not playing this game!”

“Oh c’mon, you know when I’m down, this is the number one thing that cheers me up, baby.”

“Don’t call me baby, you don’t deserve to be cheered up,” Schroeder stopped playing, “the only reason I put up with you these days is because Linus is my friend. Over the years you were just an annoyance, but I despise you.”

“You know I love you.”

“No! Nope, I do not love you, I am done sitting here listening to you talking about how we’re going to be married, trying to make out with me, or about our 2.5 kids. It ain’t gonna happen!”

“Can I at least hear one song, if I promise to be quiet and leave, I’ll even sit way over here.”

“After what you did! To my friend! You have the gall to think you still have this privilege- that should've been revoked waaay back in elementary, to sit here and listen to me play,” he approached her.

She just stood there.

“No, no, no, no, no! Who you are is why I don’t want you, you are so mean, you’re a cunt, to both of my friends, one of which is your own brother. How can you think I’d ever be in to you, when you do that shit?”

“I didn’t think, I thought it was okay?”

He nods, “yep, please get the fuck out, and never talk to me again.”

“Ummm… is there ever a chance in hell that we could ever be?”

Schroeder laughed. “please get the fuck out my house and life!”

Lucy left, she spent hours at the park, finally coming home, her parents were pissed and chewing her out.

“Mom… dad… I think… I think I need therapy,” she started crying.

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