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Green Eyes Killer	By : Isabelle_Jennings Category: DC Verse Comics > Batman Views: 3964 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: this story is non-profit, I don't own Batman or any DC Comics characters

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
PART 8: FREE
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--- SILVER ---
Silver heard the sound of the door closing and she felt like she could really breathe again. It was all just too much. It was insane. To just sort of, wake up, and you've been living this completely different life--only it hadn't really been up to you. One thing she was sure of though, was that she was in fact very much in love with Vivian Isley, with Ivy. She remembered everything, so clearly, and she'd been right before--she'd have to be an idiot not to love Ivy.
And she understood, really, why Ivy had... enslaved her. Like she was now, there was practically no way she couldn't understand it. She felt the green, just like Ivy must; felt it's pain and it... and how breathtaking it was, how much there was really there. There were no words to it, it was... like a song, or just... feelings; peaceful feelings, that moved slow, and felt pain fast, as parts of this vast community that lived and grew, healed and even fought in it's own way, for time, for life, there was always competition for those things. Except when Ivy was around. Maybe even except when she or Ivy was around, she considered, listening to the plants in the room; how they... loved her. They were just starting to really recognize her, but they were... the way they saw her, like she was living art, an idea, a friend, a revelation, a goddess maybe even, or demigoddess. Or the plant equivalent, because they really didn't perceive things in the same way. It was just... love. Simple, unqualified, no expectations love.
To protect that, to protect the green, she was pretty sure she'd do... a lot. She might even do worse than Ivy had, she considered that feeling in her heart. That passion, that sense of community, family, she felt for plants now. She touched the plants that made up her bed and they rose up a little to meet her. She closed her eyes and smiled. If felt so good. She crawled into the middle of the bed and curled up in a ball and lay there and smiled, just feeling everything around her through the green.
She felt Ivy up above too, she couldn't not. Ivy was like... like a star; she shined so bright and was so beautiful, make you cry just to look at her sometimes beautiful. So she just lay there looking from somewhere inside her. She could tell, Ivy knew she was there, but was apparently just happy to let her look however much she wanted.
Somehow that made Silver want to kiss her. And do other things to her; things that would feel even better... She moaned a little in dissatisfaction and got up, getting up and sitting in the edge of the bed. She soon found herself looking at the door across the room and trying to think of good reasons not to go out that door, find Ivy, and tell her everything was fine. Reasons not to just... be with her. Because she felt it, in her hands, in her heart, her lips... her everywhere. She wanted Ivy.
And what? She thought to herself. What does that make you? This woman turns you into her love slave, makes you -want- to be her love slave, makes you her, what, accomplice serial-killer? And you what, want to marry her once she lets you off the leash? What would that say about you? As a person? Of course, she knew it wasn't really like that--there was a lot more to it, but, looking at it from the outside, that's what a normal, human, person would think, wasn't it? That she had Stockholm syndrome and had fallen in love with her kidnapper.
She shivered a little to think of that. And of how she'd changed. She didn't see things the same way as a human would anymore. Like Ivy; plants, the green, they seemed... almost more real to her than the human world, than humans. Like she was more a plant than she was a person. To that part of her, it just seemed like the word slavery had no place at all in what had happened between them--like she and Ivy had simply... grown together. Like Ivy had just touched her, some part of her, and she'd given herself to her. Because she'd wanted to, on some level at least. Like... like she'd just behaved towards her like all the plants around her were reacting to her as she was now. Like Ivy had just spoken to her somewhere she didn't have a name for and that just the sound of that voice, of her voice, had made her happy, had made her fall in love...
Still, if she was part plant now, and she knew she was, she was still part human too, and that side of her, well, she kind of just wanted to slap Ivy across the face and yell at her... Then shove her to the ground and make love to her next, but there would be slapping and yelling first, she was sure of that. Only, it wasn't that strong a feeling, and she didn't really want to do that.... Well, maybe the throwing her down on the ground and making love to her part, that had potential as an idea...
She moaned a little again then, running her hands through her hair and shaking it on her head some, getting up and walking around the lab. She cut her foot on some broken glass a little and swore, going back to the bed and looking to check the damage. She was relieved, and a little surprised, to realize the damage had already healed. "Amazing..." She spoke, smiling a little to herself.
She sat down and considered it; her situation, what she was, what she wanted. Did she agree with Ivy's principals? Yes, she did, obviously. How cruel a person would she have to be not to want to protect the green around her--knowing, feeling what she now felt? It was like asking a child whether they loved their mother, or a mother her daughter. The answer was that obvious, and perhaps even more unchangeable. What about how Ivy was going about it? Being a serial killer? No, no problem there either. She had grown up in that world, knowing the type of people Ivy was targeting. She knew, in a way most people couldn't, that they wouldn't stop--not unless someone made them stop. And she really didn't have much pity for them. The idea of killing humans didn't really seem very abhorrent to her either. Full blooded humans did it to each other all the time, after all, and she wasn't one of them anymore. She was... she was of the green now, like Ivy was. And she was strong too, and connected, and, she ran her hands down the length of her body and smiled... and she felt so beautiful now. She walked over to a mirror on the other side of the room, being careful of the broken things on the floor now, and looked at herself. She mentally compared the woman in front of her with the woman she'd been before Ivy. The woman in front of her now was just... perfect. Her body felt strong and alive with energy and life, her skin felt so good, her eyes seemed more alive, she smiled and she gasped a little at the effect of just that. And, if she wasn't imagining it, she was even a little taller, her chest a little fuller, more... pert.
She thought back to her life before. She'd put on a good show... but she hadn't been happy. She'd had lovers, women and men, but... but she'd never been able to feel like she belonged with any of them--like they'd, like they'd give her anything she needed, make her happy for more than a few nights of uncomplicated intimacy. She hadn't known what she'd wanted, who she'd wanted to be. Oh she saw things, saw people really more clearly than other people ever could or would want to see them. She'd always been clever; too smart for her own good, her father had said. Still, she'd never had any ambitions in life, really. Her big fantasy was maybe meeting someone smart and clever like her, sexy, and interesting who'd sweep her off her feet--they'd go to Europe and get lost for a season. Maybe get married, if she could just find someone... someone who actually -got- her.
Ivy got her. She remembered all their talks; how they'd stay up late, lose track of the time. Ivy always seemed so... wrapped up in it, in her--the look in her eyes had been like whatever Silver said was the most important thing in the world to her at the time; like she just loved her so much, and wanted nothing more than to be there with her, even if it was just talking about nothing of any particular importance.
And the sex... She bit her lip a little. Well, not to sound shallow or anything, but with Ivy, it had been just... out of this world -amazing-.
So, she decided to forget anything else and just focus on what would make her happy, who would make her happy, and that was Ivy. Maybe even M'gann too, she smiled to herself. She was certainly interesting too. She'd had threesomes before, but... she thought of both of them in bed with her. It was a very nice thought.
--- IVY ---
She was towards the back wall of the greenhouse, putting some of her special fertilizer on one of the rose bushes, listening to it, communing with it in a way there wasn't words in her for. She loved being here, with all of the plants in the greenhouse she'd come to know so well, become such good friends with them... She kissed one of the leaves and got up, looking around. She saw Silver walking over to her. She'd known she was coming, been able to feel it, but she'd just let her lover come to her, feeling that was somehow important now. She did walk a few steps to meet her though. Silver's hands came to her hips and Ivy brought her hands to Silver's sides. Silver smiled to her. "You've... made a decision?" Ivy asked.
Silver moved in and kissed her, their bodies moving closer to one another. "Yes, I have... I'm with you, alright? I love you, and... well, if I'm honest, I just... I can't imagine my life without you anymore, and I'm really only very slightly annoyed about that, which -is- saying something, considering everything... I want this to work between us, more than anything..." She told, looking into Ivy's eyes meaningfully. "So I'm with you." She repeated. "...All the way."
Ivy smiled, just smiled. "I'm so glad..." She spoke, tears falling from her eyes.
Silver touched her face and wiped her tears away, moving in to kiss her. "Come to bed with me?" She asked. "We... we should talk, I know, but, right now..." She stroked Ivy's hair and pressed her body closer. "I think I just... I need to be making love with you."
Ivy just smiled, a little overwhelmed by all the feelings that felt like they'd surely overtake her. "Whatever you want..." She just agreed, feeling like she'd do just about anything this woman asked her right about then, for this to really be happening and not just a dream that would fall apart on her as soon as she blinked. She did blink though, and Silver was still there.
"Come on." Silver smiled, taking Ivy's hands in hers and tugging her towards the greenhouse door.
So they walked silently, hand in hand, through the night, across the lawn, back into the house. They could both see well enough in the dark, so it wasn't a problem. It was an ability Ivy had been sure to give herself and, by extension, Silver. It was a good survival trait after all; also, it meant she didn't have to bother or confuse the plants around her with artificial lighting, and, as a bonus, it saved at least some electricity.
As they walked through the ground floor, Ivy did worry a little after what had gone on with M'gann and what she'd gone off to deal with, but, well, she trusted M'gann to take care of it, and Silver was more important than worrying over something that probably wasn't even a problem.
Silver led her up the stairs, through the hallways, to their room. Silver didn't say a word, just glancing her way sometimes, and Ivy was a little scared to break the spell of this with words if Silver didn't first.
"I need some water; want some?" Silver asked once they were in their room again.
"Okay." Ivy accepted, going over and crawling into bed; sitting, facing the bathroom where Silver went, waiting for her. She heard the water running.
Silver came back carrying two big buckets of water; she was wet head to toe also, apparently having gotten under the shower. Ivy perked up, watching her lover walk over to her; the drops of water rolling off her naked skin, glistening in the moonlight. She swallowed. Silver got up on the bed in front of her, sat one of the buckets down and poured the other over herself. "I was so thirsty..." Silver explained in a very sensual sounding voice. "Can I?" She asked, looking over at the remaining bucket.
Ivy laughed happily. "A world of yes." She got up on her knees and moved toward Silver. Silver picked up the bucket of water and poured it over her, Ivy feeling the mildly cool water drenching her. She ran her hands through her hair, over her chest, and smiled to Silver who tossed the buckets off the bed and came over to her; kissing her hungrily, pushing her back onto her back and getting on top of her. Ivy kissed her back and slid her hands over Silver's body, through her wet hair. The plants that made up their bed appreciated the water too, it made them happier, feel even more alive, which only added to the energy between them. "Mm, this feels so good..." Ivy smiled blissfully as Silver licked and kissed at her neck. The water felt great, she hadn't realized that she'd let herself get a little dehydrated during the day; so much had been happening. And the feel of her hands on Silver's slick, wet body; the feel of Silver's body sliding over hers...
She gasped as Silver slid her thigh against her sex. Silver took her wrists and held her to the bed then, kissing her neck. "Mmm, oh, lover..." Ivy spoke blissfully, causing Silver to claim her lips in a fierce, heated kiss that just seemed to last and last, one kiss after another after another.
Silver let go of one of her wrists and brought her hand down between them, sliding her fingers over Ivy's sex; lightly at first, then with more force. Ivy moaned as Silver just kept making out with her, fucking her. Soon, Silver's fingers slid inside her, her thumb teasing her clit, pressing in a little, then Silver started to thrust, their bodies sliding together in long practiced harmony.
Silver let go of her other wrist and brought Ivy's hand down between them too, guiding Ivy to her lover's sex. Ivy found it wet and waiting, so she slipped inside and played her fingers about just the way she knew Silver liked best. "Fuck yes..." Silver spoke, breaking off their kissing and collapsing her upper body on top of Ivy, starting to kiss her neck again. "Mm, more, faster..." She signed, laying her head against the side of Ivy's forehead on the bed.
Ivy's free hand was on Silver's lower back and Silver's free hand was in Ivy's hair now, on her scalp. The rhythm between them kept up until Ivy couldn't think, just feel and do and be and then she came, and Silver came on her fingers at nearly the same time, and Ivy felt free and happy. Silver collapsed completely on top of her and Ivy held her to her and just felt so good. So... secure in herself, in a way she never remembered being before. The person she loved and wanted to be with so much more than anyone else in the world; that person wanted her back, loved her back, was... was going to be hers forever--she just knew it. That feeling was just indescribably good; like something inside of her that had been so long lonely and searching and... and afraid.. was really, finally at peace and... and whole. She held onto her lover and just smiled. "I love you, I love you so very much, Silver..."
Silver moved, propped herself up a little and looked down into Ivy's eyes, searching... actually, actually trusting. Silver still trusted her somehow, that was such a gift. "I know... I know that." Silver answered softly, kissing her gently on the lips. "And it's... It makes all the difference." She told her, laying her head down and kissing Ivy's neck lazily. "I love you too." She seemed to smile. "It's crazy how much; kind of overwhelming... Like I just... I just want to hold onto you and never let you away from me..." She admitted, swallowing and kissing Ivy's skin more.
"Mmmm... This does feel so... so perfect, doesn't it?" Ivy spoke softly.
Silver smiled against her skin. "More perfect than a world without cars or dirty rich people and corporations, chemical factories, clear cutting of rain forests?" She teased a little.
Ivy smiled weakly. "...Are you asking if you're more important to me than that?" She asked, not feeling all that good about this particular conversation.
"No." Silver replied, getting up and looking into Ivy's troubled eyes again. "I know I'm not, not really. Honestly... I'm not sure I feel differently myself, now. About the green, about wanting so badly to protect it..." She admitted.
Ivy closed her eyes and then opened them. "I'd never get over it." She answered softly.
"What?" Silver asked back, curious sounding.
"Losing you... It would... It would tear something out in me, and I know... I can tell, I wouldn't get it back; not for... not for a long time at least." She admitted in that same quiet voice. "It's as if... you're just... it... for me. The place inside me..." She closed her eyes. "There's always been this dark place in me." She told her, opening her eyes again. "You're the only one who's ever been able to..."
"Light you up?" Silver asked with a little of a forced smile.
Ivy smiled back just a little. "Yes..."
Silver sighed. "...I'm not sure I want that responsibility." She admitted.
"...Responsibility?" Ivy asked.
Silver met her eyes again. "Nothing..." She answered, laying back down over Ivy, snuggling into her. "Just hold me, okay?" She asked.
"...Of course..." Ivy agreed easily, wondering a little at what Silver could have meant by what she'd said. Before, she could have just told her lover to tell her and Silver would have, now it was different. Still better, but different... She did want Silver to tell her; wanted no secrets, even little ones... but, she guessed, she'd just have to work to get to that place with Silver now, honestly. And that would be better than it had been; it was now, and, when she got to that place, it would be perfect. How much are you still mine, Silver? Ivy couldn't help but wonder. Silver... she said the right things, did the right things, looked at her the right way so Ivy knew she was being genuine with her, but... how much space was there between them now? Between their hearts? Suddenly she didn't feel quite as happy as she had before. Still happy though, just, maybe a little bit more realistic. Knowing this was just going to... take time...
"...Ivy?" Silver asked.
"...Um, yes?"
"...I would have loved you... I would have fallen in love with you anyway, even if you hadn't made me... yours..." Silver told only a little bitterly, getting up and straddling Ivy, looking down at her, her eyes unsure and a little lost. "I just want you to know that."
"Silver?" Ivy replied softly, sitting up so Silver was sitting on her lap, and holding her waist. Silver put her arms around her too, on her back, their eyes locked together. "...You're really sure of that?" She asked, a little dread forming in her. Not so much of possible regret, but about where this might be going.
"Sure enough. You're perfect for me. I might not have realized it right away, but it's true and I know I would have been drawn to you enough to find that out for myself..." Silver explained softly, looking away and slumping her back a little so she could rest her chin on Ivy's shoulder. "What do you think about that, Ivy?" She asked into her ear.
"...I'm not sure. ...You wish I hadn't... made you mine?" She asked.
"...No..." Silver answered softly. "Maybe you needed me to be yours?" She told her. "Maybe... maybe I didn't mind..." She admitted in an even softer voice. "Maybe a part of me even misses it a little..."
"...Do you really?" Ivy asked.
Silver moved back and looked into her eyes, all sorts of emotions going on inside her, Ivy could tell. "A little..." Silver admitted. "I kept my promise though, I'm... I'm never leaving you, Ivy. No matter what. Just the idea of doing that... It hurts so much, just to think about... not being with you anymore..." She confessed, a few tears escaping her eyes. "Is that fair? Just to, to wake up one night and be -that- completely, hopelessly in love with another person? Maybe it's not, and maybe I should care more that it's not, but... I don't... I don't Ivy, I just... want you... more than I'd have even though I -could- want... I want you..." She kissed her then, almost desperately.
Ivy kissed back, both of them clinging to one another fiercely, their bodies pressing together, moving against one another like they'd done hundreds of times before. Ivy felt a little adrift actually, the strength of emotion she sensed behind Silver's confession staggering her to consider. To consider what she'd done to this woman; how she'd brought this about. But, more than anything, that Silver loved her so much that none of it mattered to her nearly so much as the result of them having found one another, that set her mind and heart at ease so much. Made her think that, that maybe she didn't have to know everything about her lover. Maybe she just needed to know that one simple thing, and that everything else that needed to be between them would come from that; naturally, in its own time. They were more plant than human now, anyway, and that's how plants were. They grew in their own time, and were always beautiful... At least until their time was over, and their inheritors' time began. Ivy had every intention of being as trees with Silver however, and having their time last a long, long time. As long as she could possibly manage.
Ivy leaned Silver back, slowly, inevitably, until she was under her on the bed. She smiled softly down to her lover. "Let me love you; show you how... how devoted I am, I... I'm yours Silver. You made me yours. I belong to you, alright? Tell me... tell me..."
"...You belong to me..." Silver repeated the words softly, a little reverently.
"Mmnn... I do." Ivy kissed her softly, once then again and smiled to her.
"I belong to you too, I suppose." Silver smiled. "Still."
Ivy smiled back, a little triumph in her eyes. "Good..." She answered, lowering herself down to Silver's breasts and taking one of the nipples in her mouth a little, kissing it, using her tongue.
"Mmm, I love us together..." Silver spoke, sounding happy and arching her back a little.
Soon, Ivy was going down on her lover, a thrill going through her as her tongue touched Silver's sex.
Silver was still in love with her, it was all real.
The thought just seemed to stay in her mind and not go away, and each time she thought it, she felt nearly overwhelmingly happy.
--- M'GANN ---
In her dreams, she was with Artemis again. The love of her life had returned to her from a lake of fire and she had gone in to meet her. She felt the fire burning her as she kissed her lover, but she didn't care. And then Artemis asked her... why had she been unfaithful to her? Why had she been with other women? Why? Why had she given up on them? And M'gann couldn't answer, was too ashamed to answer, and so, with a shock, she woke up.
Where were her eyes? What had... she concentrated. Everything... hurt. Her mind felt... numb. Someone was in her arms... Catalina. Lina. Where were the other two... where were Nina and Shelley? She couldn't tell, but all of the sudden, none of it mattered to her, because she knew what the dream meant. She'd been... sick somehow, last night. The green, Ivy, Lina, all of it; she'd been... mind drunk... Lost to feelings and desires she hadn't been able to control or even really understand. She hadn't seen what was important. The one thing in all of it, in the whole of her life since the day Artemis had been murdered, that was really, truly, important, and she'd missed it.
She forced her mouth to move. "Lazarus pits." She spoke the words, forcing her body to come back to the shape she needed, the shape she was used to. She'd let herself change into... mostly plants, hadn't she? Only a bare outline of a woman holding and being held by Lina, the rest of her grown out in roots and vines and shoots and flowers and leaves. She opened her eyes, pushed Lina away from her, gently, so her new... so her new lover wouldn't wake. She sat up and touched her hair. Blonde, comforting. she looked down at her skin though, it was... tan, and human looking. So familiar. She looked around for a mirror and saw them next to her.
"Nina... Shelley..." She spoke softly, touching Nina's forehead, then her throat. "Alive, she's alive..." And then looking, with growing fear and terror, from her to Shelley ...or... what was left of Shelley. A sob escaped her and she started to cry. "No... no, no, no, no, no!" She repeated, backing away and bumping into Lina, waking her.
"Wha... what's... M'gann? What's..." Lina started to say.
M'gann gathered her lover up in her arms protectively. "Don't... don't look..." She pleaded softly, still crying.
"What's wrong?" Lina asked in a quiet voice. "What, fuck, what did Viv do to me?" She asked, pushing away from M'gann. "We slept together; you, you were in my head!" Lina accused, backing away from her and getting out of bed, her eyes finding Nina and Shelley. "What in the..." Her eyes found M'gann's. "What did you do to them?! Monster!" She screamed. "You murdered them; you, you made me..." She collapsed and started throwing up.
M'gann was stunned; she tried frantically to get inside Lina's head to calm her, tell her she hadn't meant for... for any of it to happen. That none of it was her fault, anyone's fault. It was just... just something tragic that hadn't been in her control. But when she tried, there was... nothing. It just hurt. She couldn't stand to keep trying so she stopped. "I'm mind-blind." She spoke in a whisper, wiping her tears away and turning to look at Nina and Shelley again.
Shelley was... she was just gone. A mass of roots growing from her, all dead. M'gann didn't even know; couldn't remember how that could have, how she could have... done that. She wouldn't have even thought she would have had the ability to do that; to change someone else's shape in the ways she'd have needed to in order to do that. "The green..." She realized. The energy of it. She could still feel the echoes of it. Of what had happened. Shelley had been so drawn to it; she'd wanted to... be it, be a plant. And herself, she'd been so... so mind-drunk, she had been doing anything her lovers wanted her to without even thinking about it by that point, so she'd... she'd tried to give Shelley her wish. She looked at Shelley now, fresh tears in her eyes. "Guess... I just, I just tried something I had no idea how to do, didn't I? Didn't we?" She asked sadly.
She felt sick inside, and guilty. About Shelley, but... Artemis... She was having a hard time facing it. She got up out of bed and looked at herself in the mirror. She just stood there, ran her hands over her body a little, touched her face. Artemis's face, Artemis's body. She'd changed herself into her lover. She closed her eyes and willed herself to change back to the self she'd become used to. The blonde haired green woman who grieved her lost lover by mimicking her hair color; how Artemis's hair had felt to touch. She tried, or tried to try at least, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it, to change back. She opened her eyes again and looked at the woman, twenty-one years old and so completely beautiful to her own eyes, in the mirror, and she smiled. "I'll find you again, love, I promise I will. I found a way. I didn't think there was one, but... there is. We'll, we'll be together again." She found herself smiling happily, almost laughing with how giddy she felt.
"What are you doing?!" Nina cried to her from the other side of the room. "Are you smiling?" She asked, sounding scared now.
"Yes, I am." She closed her eyes and sighed, turning around to look at Lina, who had backed up against the wall on the opposite side of the room, obviously scared of her. "I know..." She looked at Nina and Shelley a moment then looked away, ashamed. "I know this is really terrible, Lina. I wish I could have stopped this from happening." She looked over and met Lina's eyes. "But I just figured out I can bring her back. Maybe I can even bring Shelley back." She offered.
"What... what are you talking about?" Nina asked, guardedly.
"Lazarus pits." M'gann smiled. "Talia told me; they bring back the dead. I saw in her mind the proof that it was true. I can bring Artemis back. I just need to kill her father for her, and she'll show me how they work--I know she will."
"That's..." Lina held her head and shook it. "M'gann... What did we do last night? What happened? Why..."
M'gann floated quickly across the room to her lover's side, holding her gently, even though Lina flinched away from her a little at first. "Shh, it's, it's going to be okay. Alright?" She comforted her softly. Like it or not, M'gann realized, she cared deeply for this woman now. She couldn't just abandon her after what just happened; even... even if it meant waiting just a little longer to have Artemis back. Though doing this for Lina probably wouldn't affect the time it took, thankfully. She just had to take care of all this as fast as possible, that's all. "It was just... I was, I guess you'd call it mind-drunk. Ivy, the green, what she's connected to... it's so much bigger than me, overwhelming; everything green and growing everywhere in the world loves her--the power of that, it's just... and you, you're... You were tied to her, to the green; you'd do whatever Ivy wanted, whatever I wanted. It wasn't the same for me. It was like... sudden, unreasoning infatuation; with Ivy, with the green--I wasn't myself. And when I bonded with you, I got, I got lost all the way. I would have done anything you or Shelley or Nina wanted me to do--no hesitation or doubt or even thought--and Shelley... she wanted... she..."
"She wanted to be a plant. I... I remember..." Lina confirmed, the realization coming to her. She remembered it all, she was just having trouble processing apparently, M'gann realized. "What about... what about Nina? What happened to her? Is she, is she dead too?" Lina asked, sounding scared again. But scared from realizing that she might be responsible for this too somehow more than scared of her, M'gann could tell. She couldn't read Lina's mind anymore of course, but she'd been inside her very deeply; they'd imprinted on one another, so she knew everything about her now. "And why do you look like that? Like... Like Artemis... Shit... I remember Artemis, I remember... you." She looked at M'gann helplessly as she started to cringe and hold her head. "I remember..." She whispered, sort of crumbling in M'gann's arms.
"This... this is probably what happened to Nina; Lina, you have to, you have to stay with me, focus on my voice. I can't... I can't help you with this like I should be able to; I've... I've gone mind-blind." M'gann told her, feeling a little panic.
"What... what's wrong with me?" Lina moaned, she was crying on M'gann's shoulder now, obviously in pain.
"It's my memories; probably Nina and Shelley's too. They're crowding your mind out; you don't have the thought-structure in place to handle it." M'gann told her.
"What... what do I do?" She collapsed, her legs not holding her up anymore. M'gann lowered her to the floor, noticing the smell of the vomit in the room finally, now that she was down closer to it. She used her telekinesis to flash-blast the room, clean the air and move the vomit outside and close the widow. She didn't need distractions right now. Thankfully her telekinesis was still working. "My head; it's like... like I'm burning, like I'm... going to... to shatter..." Lina was crying uncontrollably now.
"Focus on me, Lina. Just focus on me; remember me. Don't think of anything else. Try... try to imagine yourself becoming me. Everything I know is inside you, and that part of you; she knows how to keep you sane and in one piece. You just have to be her, be me; just for a while. Otherwise..." M'gann trailed off.
"Otherwise I'll go insane... or a coma or I die... I know... I know..." Lina answered. "Have to... be you, be, be M'gann... M'gann M'orzz... I'm M'gann M'orzz, I'm... I'm Miss Martian, I was... I was... I was so alone..." She started sobbing again.
"But then you heard Cay'an? Then... then you found Artemis, and... and you fell in love... and, and it was so beautiful; everything you could ever want mostly, but... but then..." M'gann trailed off.
"Saturn Queen; that... that fucking evil bitch--she... she killed her. Aggahh!" She flailed about wildly in M'gann's arms. "I'll kill her; tear her apart... rip her..." And she was crying again. "She's dead. Artemis..."
"She is, but you're, you're going to bring her back, M'gann... There's a Lazarus pit--Talia knows--you'll, you'll get her back; you just... you just have to pull yourself together, fix your mind, build the right structures. Come on M'gann, ~you've known how to do that since you were a little girl and your mother and aunts were bringing you dead things to eat. This should be easy.~" She told Lina, saying the last part in Martian, hoping that would help.
"Right... ~Should be easy.~" Lina repeated softly, laying limply against M'gann and closing her eyes.
M'gann waited there with her; trying not to give up hope, stroking her hair, saying words of soft encouragement to her in Martian, and trying to hold onto the fact that this was all going to be worth it once she had Artemis back. Once she had Artemis again, it, it would all just be like a bad dream, and she'd, she'd really belong somewhere, with someone again.
Time passed and finally Lina stirred. "~What happened?~" She asked a little drowsily in Martian.
"~It's okay, you're... you're okay.~ You're going to be okay." M'gann promised, feeling a huge weight fall off her as relief flooded through her. At least she hadn't; at least Lina was okay. That was; that meant a lot. She really didn't want to feel guilty like that about another person on top of what she already felt guilty about.
Lina blinked her eyes open and stared at M'gann; a smile, full and beautiful, coming to her lips. "Artemis, you're here, oh, you're here!" She spoke with so much joy as she kissed M'gann--so much passion and longing going into that kiss, M'gann could almost swear she felt some of it, even through her mind-blindness. "Don't, don't ever leave me again..." Lina just kept kissing her until M'gann pushed her away and swallowed a lump in her throat, willing herself to... to change, to be herself again. Her green, Martian self with blonde hair who mourned her dead lover. "What... wha..." Lina touched M'gann's face and started to cry. "It isn't real..." She started weeping, and M'gann just held her, unconsciously slipping back into a copy of Artemis's body again; not really being able to help herself. It was like, this was her tether, to Artemis, to the promise she'd made to Artemis when she was alive. That she'd be only hers.
"I know, I know..." M'gann soothed. "I'm sorry.... Try to remember. You're Lina, you're... you're not me, Lina."
"I'm..." Lina sat up, sat back, looked at M'gann; her body once again that of Artemis. "Do you have to look like that?" She asked in a small, sad voice.
M'gann closed her eyes and willed herself to change back again; though it hurt, emotionally, to do it. Like, somehow, she wasn't being as faithful as she should, even if there was a good reason. 'Artemis wouldn't want you to hurt your friend,' she told herself, all the while knowing that Artemis would probably really hate this woman and not want to even see her once she found out M'gann had been her lover while she'd been... dead... "Better?" She asked Lina gently.
Lina nodded, backing up a little more and getting to her feet. Wordlessly going over to the bed and going to check on Nina, avoiding looking at M'gann while she did.
"What's wrong?" M'gann asked, able to tell something was from how Lina was apparently trying to ignore her a little.
"You can't help her, can you?' Lina asked, still looking only at Nina.
"...No. Maybe if my telepathy comes back, I'll be able to, but... not like this; not blinded like this..." She admitted, going over and sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at Lina's back.
"And... you don't; you were never really in love with me, or them, were you? It was just... you, mind-drunk on, on Viv, or the green or something; is that it?" Lina asked softly.
"I... yes... that's... yes." M'gann admitted. "I care about you, about them... Maybe even -almost- love you, but... yes. It wasn't real."
"I thought so." Lina answered.
"...What is it? Why are you... asking that...?" M'gann asked, touching Lina's shoulder.
"I'm asking because... I'm not in love with Viv, with Ivy, I'm... I'm not sure I ever really knew her like I thought I did. I mean, I get it now; about... why, why she's doing all this... It's messed up, but, she's probably right. She's probably known better than any of us what was right, all this time. But... I'm not in love with her." Lina repeated soberly, softly. "I don't even think I like her; don't even want to see her again, honestly."
"Then what?" M'gann asked, itching to leave and find Talia, but not able to just leave Lina just yet without knowing she was going to be alright.
"What is... I think... I think I'm in love with you." Lina admitted, turning and looking at her.
"...You... What?" M'gann asked, confused. "How, that... that doesn't even make any sense!" She protested.
"Tell me about it." Lina agreed, sounding a little defeated. "I just, I look at you now, and... and it's there. I'm in love with you. I mean, I know everything--every small little detail of who you are now. And I have the feeling of just... love... for that person I know so well. Like I... like I want to know her even better. Be her friend... be her lover... Try to be her everything... And I know... Artemis; and I know I don't stand a chance against that--against her, but... I don't stand a chance, do I?" She asked, a little hope finding its way into voice.
"I... I can't deal with this right now." M'gann answered, getting up; letting her body change into Artemis's again, mentally willing herself to grow clothes over her skin, and floating out the door, not looking back.
"Fuck." M'gann heard Lina's defeated voice behind her and she felt guilty even more.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(to be continued)
- 7
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- 9
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Green Eyes Killer