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Road Trip	By : Kip Category: DC Verse Cartoons > Justice League Views: 4334 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Justice League, and I do not make any money from these writings.

Chapter List
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Synopsis: a smattering of light-hearted whimsical humour/fun based loosely on the Batman/Superman characters as seen in the Justice League animated TV series, with the addition of an amount of rather adult content.
Please note: as things stand at the moment this is a stand-alone piece and is NOT intended to tie in with any other of my other fics, so don't expect any consistency. If you find some, then consider it a bonus!
"Normal Speech"
Thoughts
EMPHASIS
Reviewers will be rewarded with nice things … like more story…
'Purr
Arriving at the cove around midday, the two friends had immediately thrown themselves fully into the demanding task of vacationing...
Kal launched himself enthusiastically into the choppy surf and disappeared as smoothly as a seal, leaving only a faint expanding ring of foam to show that he had ever been there at all.
All afternoon the two of them had been diving into the sparkling waves and swimming back and forth across the modest bay. Finally their explorations had taken them out to the very tip of the crescent rocks that marked the ends of 'their' personal playground.
And that's about enough for today… Beginning to feel the first stages of fatigue setting in, Bruce stood on the jutting rock and stared at the heaving water. Having clambered uncomplaining over the rocks following Kal's ever-enthusiastic lead, he had just discovered that the changeable wind had switched direction and was now bringing a front of colder air rolling in across the bay.
The weather's on the change. Rapidly turning an unwholesome opaque grey, the seawater slid slickly over the glistening rocks, clawing at the stones as it went. The previously sparkling waters were starting to look distinctly unappealing.
"Screw that!" Bruce said emphatically and aloud, not even caring if there was any way for someone to overhear him at that moment. "Kal, you have got to be mad if you think I'm jumping back in there now, buddy. No way on this planet…"
Or on any other… He added mentally, glaring at the mocking ocean. The fine hairs across Bruce's neck and shoulders began to rise as the temperature gradually sank. High above a cohort of gulls screamed into the wind as they effortlessly rode the churning air currents.
One of us is invulnerable, and I haven't forgotten that it isn't me… With a booming wet smack, the tip of a particularly hungry wave licked around Bruce's feet, sucking at his ankles and tasting each of his toes as it retreated.
Brrr … that stuff's getting cold! Urgently scrubbing the majority of the clinging water droplets from his bare arms and legs, Bruce momentarily allowed his thoughts to wander to other than strictly seaside pursuits. He could think of several VERY agreeable ways of warming up… Not that he expected that Kal would ever be persuaded to relax THAT much… even supposing a miracle happened and Bruce were somehow able to psych himself up sufficiently to ask…
It was a pleasantly diverting way to spend a few moments, and just for once Bruce indulged himself to the full. He was allowed to daydream, wasn’t he?
Even if there's no chance of it ever happening…
If he hadn't been feeling distinctly windswept and more than a little chilled the normally intensely-private man wouldn't have chanced lowering his guard even that much with Kal roaming free in the vicinity, but Bruce at least was only human and the breeze nipping along his skin was making him shiver enough that any other physical reaction seemed unlikely. That brought about a swift realization: wasn't Kal taking a rather long time to surface?
Where the heck is he? Considering the big guy was normally so adamant about restricting himself to purely human levels of activity just in case anyone happened to be watching them, surely Kal should have come up by now?
"Boo!"
Bruce jumped nearly out of his skin as the gloriously happy tones sounded just inches behind him.
"Kal! You!" Only his years of training ensured that he kept his footing on the precariously slippery stones. "I nearly…" The amused twinkle in the blue eyes warmed him, despite the rising chill of the wind.
Kal smiled shyly. "Sorry, Bruce, the current's a lot stronger than I expected. It was easier to haul myself out onto the rocks and walk back round the point, rather than try to swim against it. When I saw you standing here daydreaming, I couldn't resist … I wouldn't have let you fall in though. I swear I wouldn't."
Of course he wouldn’t… Bruce decided that he couldn't in all honesty have a go at Kal, not considering what he had been daydreaming about… "It's okay." He admitted. "I was miles away just then."
"You would be if you fell in there now," Kal stated with finality. "The tide's turned. The current out there is quite fierce. I had to," He blushed as if he were about to admit to some deep and terrible secret, "Put a little, ahem, additional effort into it, as it were, or I would have been dragged halfway toward the next bay by now."
"Then I'm glad I didn't just leap straight in after you." Bruce said firmly.
Kal nodded a fraction. "So am I." He paused, glancing around and rapidly reassuring himself that they were still truly alone. "It's great being out here … I'd hate for anything to spoil our vacation." He said finally.
Bruce clapped him on the shoulder, but employing a little necessary caution, as he didn’t want his fingers stinging for the next ten minutes. "I'm glad you're enjoying yourself." He told his friend.
"But are YOU?" Kal blinked at him. "Enjoying yourself, I mean?"
"Don't I look it?" Bruce countered.
"You look cold." The taller man decided. A concerned frown creased his brow. "Are you sure you're okay?"
Bruce could see the anxiety beginning to build. A hero complex was not an easy thing to suppress, although some people were better at it than others. He wasn't going to have Kal getting angsty today, and certainly not over HIM.
"Nothing a spot of supper won't fix." He promised. "Come on. Let's get back to the cottage and get some hot food inside us."
Food finished, and dishes duly done, the two friends decided to end their first day with a healthy hike along the cliffs. A modest walk brought them to the little settlement that gave the bay its name.
The small seaside town was built around ancient cart tracks, with small alleys rather than streets, the houses crowding together around tiny narrow passages that looked barely big enough for the two of them to walk abreast.
Closet romantic that he was, Kal of course loved it. Bruce was yet to be convinced: to his way of thinking there was not enough room to move if things turned nasty.
Get a grip! Even if you are on vacation, you're still the Batman - and if that wasn't enough you're less than two inches away from the Man of Steel! For god's sake, man, how much more reassurance do you NEED? He told himself that firmly, at least twice an hour. He thought it might be helping since he had even managed to leave 'The Suit' still packed firmly away in the bottom of his locked and heavily reinforced case.
But you still brought it with you, didn’t you?! Somewhere in his head, Bruce wondered if it were entirely normal to have these conversations with yourself? Still, there was little else that was 'normal' about his life, so why should this be any different?
"Hey, take a look at those geraniums!" Kal was staring up at a window box on the second floor of one of the rambling buildings.
Bruce glanced upwards, easily locating the object of his friend's curiosity. "So?"
"Mom was trying to grow those dark geraniums for years." Kal explained. "They don't seem to do very well on the farm. They never get more than a few inches high, then they shrivel up."
"Maybe it's all that fresh country air?" Bruce grinned, half amused at himself for even thinking of participating in such a crazy conversation.
Only HE could get me to do this…
"Although it doesn't seem to have stunted YOUR growth any…" Bruce added wryly.
"Very funny." Kal gave him a sarcastic pout.
Does he even know he's doing that? It was cute though…
"Whoa!" Kal suddenly turned serious.
Bruce knew that expression. He ought to by now. "Trouble?"
"For someone…" Kal nodded.
Following behind his friend, Bruce caught the sound of a female voice. Trust Kal to find a damsel in distress…
If there was one within 500 miles, it figures that she'd practically trip over us…
"I told you before. There IS no treasure in there. Nothing! What bit of 'nothing' do you find hard to understand?" A female voice was saying.
"You don't fool me. No one makes that much fuss over a pile of old rocks!" A man's voice replied.
"You really are as ignorant as you look, aren't you?" The woman said curtly. "Did you have to practice, or does it come naturally?"
"You might want to think twice about insulting me … You should be real careful, Melly, I'd make a bad enemy, and it's a long way back over the cliffs, in the dark... Who knows what else could happen? Girl all alone out there… Especially with how you are…"
"Are you threatening me, William Kerris?"
"For a person with no friends, you have a real smart mouth!" Kerris smirked.
Kal had obviously heard enough by now as he took one quick step forward, rounded the corner, and tapped the other man on the shoulder; with Bruce following closer than his shadow.
"What the?" Kerris wheeled round, only to find himself addressing a broad expanse of black leather jacket. He looked up, and up, and up.
"Who says Melly doesn’t have any friends?" Kal enquired.
The expression of horror on the smaller man's face was utterly priceless.
If somehow nothing else noteworthy happened all week, Bruce vowed that he would consider everything worth it for this one moment alone. He tried very hard not to laugh out loud and ruin it.
The unpleasant Mr. Kerris gave a sort of strangled grunt and, without hesitation, legged it as fast as he could toward the relative safety of one of the local bars.
Pensively, Kal watched the retreating figure until it vanished around the corner, and maybe even for a few more seconds afterwards. "Uhm, I do hope you didn't mind?" He asked carefully. "I know it was presumptuous, but I, uh …"
"Mind?" A soft voice replied. "Why would I mind? I'm not exactly in prime condition at the moment. I could have hit him with my stick, I suppose? But then I would have probably toppled over too." The would-be victim paused and then added, "Actually it was rather refreshing to be rescued, and so gallantly. Thank you, uhm, both…"
Bruce stepped out from beside his colleague and took his first look at the 'damsel'. For once, she actually fit the description: in her mid to late twenties and with the right ratio of curves to height, but it was the substantial plaster casts wrapped firmly around her right arm and right leg, rather than her natural appearance, that immediately drew both men's attention.
"Mellisandra Cauley. I'd usually offer to shake hands, but as you can see, it's a bit difficult at the moment." The young lady said immediately. "Call me Melly, my friends do."
Bemused, Bruce nodded.
Kal seemed to have found his voice again. "Wow. What happened to you?" He waved at the white casts.
"Seven breaks in the leg, three in the arm, and I was lucky that my ribs were bruised rather than broken." Melly answered brightly. "But, forget that – I'm thirsty. Would you two charming gentlemen care to join me for a celebratory drink? I'm buying! It's not every day that I meet up with friends that even I didn't know I had!"
"We'd love to." Bruce decided. "And the first round is on me." He winked at her and shamelessly applied full-charm mode. "I insist."
"A building fell on me." Melly said candidly, nursing her drink. "Well, I say 'fell' but that would make it sound accidental."
"And you don't think it was?" Being who he was, Bruce was immediately interested.
"There's nothing accidental about arson and blocked doors." The young woman replied. "I was lucky."
"Lucky?" Kal stared at the crutch and the abundance of plaster of Paris in open disbelief.
"I got out alive." Melly said softly. "Two of my colleagues weren't so fortunate. Since there are no other suitable rooms for hire at the moment, I'm having to live on site at the diggings. Not that there's any actual digging being done there, the place mainly needs cataloguing. In fact, being there full time has been useful, it's certainly given me a few unexpected insights."
"Well, I hope you had good insurance?" Kal was saying.
"Oh yes, it's all fully covered. All done by my employers."
"That's handy." Kal nodded. "Who do you work for, if you don’t mind me asking?"
"Not at all – it's Angica Archaeological Consultancy." She said brightly.
A division of Wayne Industries… Suddenly Bruce decided that this was starting to get personal. Who would be attacking my employees though, and why?
"If you don’t mind me asking, what are you working on out in the middle of nowhere?" Vacationing or not, it was obvious that Kal was channeling at least one little bit of his 'Clark Kent: Ace Reporter' persona.
"The Finsham Caves…" Bruce finally put two and two together and hoped that the required answer actually amounted to four. Otherwise it was going to be embarrassing. Melly might not know who he was, but Kal did…
"Why yes!" Melly sounded surprised. "Not many people outside of Walker's Bay have even heard of the caves. Are you an archaeology buff, Bruce?"
"No, just a guy with a thing about Caves…" Kal chuckled, unexpectedly saving him from answering.
Narrowing his eyes, Bruce started to wonder exactly how many straight shots it took to get a Kryptonian drunk?
Maybe about the same amount that Kal has sunk while the three of us have been sitting here?
It occurred to Bruce that there were an awful lot of empty glasses, and he knew for certain that neither he nor Melly had consumed very much. Oh dear… This was starting to look like exactly the sort of situation they REALLY wanted to avoid…
"Spelunker?" Melly guessed, continuing on from Kal's previous statement.
"Sort of," Bruce covered himself. "But nice as this evening has been, I think that we'd better be getting back to the cottage." He decided. "Before someone," He gave Kal a pointed look. "Gets himself into trouble."
Kal sighed. "Oh, but we were just getting …" He tailed off as he caught the dark stare that Bruce was giving him. "Okay."
Bruce smiled at him and gave a deprecating shrug to their new acquaintance. "What can I say? It's a long way back. Another time?"
Melly giggled. "Yes. I think you'd better take Sir Galahad here home and see that he makes it to bed safely. Didn't you say you were both staying in Clifftop Cottage? You aren’t planning on driving back, are you?"
"No." Bruce assured her. "We left both bikes back at the cottage anyway."
Melly looked confused. "Then how were you planning on getting there?"
"Walking." He shrugged. "Along the cliff path."
"At this time of night? It'll be pitch black up there." Their new acquaintance looked genuinely concerned, and since Bruce couldn’t tell her how they'd actually expected to travel back, he could hardly protest.
"Tell you what, wait a minute more and I'll call Charlie over and ask if he'll let you ride in the back of the truck when he drops me off?" Melly offered. "Clifftop's only a short stroll from the access road."
Kal hiccoughed softly.
Bruce noted that, along with the way that his large friend was gradually sliding lower in the seat, and decided that the prospect of making sure that they both got safely back to the cottage over the unmade road and then along the narrow cliff path, did not appeal in the least.
No way was Bruce going to let the other man get airborne while under the influence – assuming Kal could even fly at all in this state, one of them wasn’t the slightest bit invulnerable!
Which means that we really would have to walk, doesn’t it? Night vision or not, sticking to the paths wasn’t going to be Bruce's biggest problem. That alcohol was only going to kick in more strongly as the night wore on, and Bruce knew from painful experience that Kal was every bit as solid as he looked. More so, in fact.
"Thanks." He said gratefully. Beside him, Kal hiccoughed again, and began to hum softly to himself, leaning very slightly against Bruce's shoulder in the process. Privately, Bruce found it more than a little endearing.
Oh boy, I must have it bad… Part of him wondered if there was any cure for a serious case of Superman-itis? The rest of him hoped not.
tbc…
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Road Trip