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Writings of the Heart	By : meathead13 Category: Comics > Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Views: 3683 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 12
- 13
- 14
Chapter Thirteen: Discoveries
“Are you sure you’re going to be alright with those two?”
Carrie sighed, unable to keep from shaking her head back and forth. “Don’t worry about it, Barry. Everything is fine now. Trust me.”
She leaned in and wrapped her arms around Barry, and he quickly returned her embrace. They followed up with trading kisses on each others cheeks before Barry gathered up his baggage.
“Now, you’re absolutely sure that-,”
“Barry! Go home!” Carrie placed her hands on Barry’s shoulders and spun him around until he was facing the closed doors of the large blue and gray bus.
“Can I just say something else?” Barry asked, turning his head to look over his shoulder.
Carrie sighed again, her arms crossing over her chest impatiently. “No, but I know you’re going to anyway.”
Barry turned back around, his face twisted in a mocking smile. “Yes I am. As you’re best friend, I insist.”
“Well, go ahead.”
“Do you need the number to Animal Control, just in case things get out of hand?”
Carrie’s mouth dropped instantly, the corners trying to curl into a smile. “You asshole!”
“Seriously though,” Barry let his bags fall back down to the pavement and he folded his fingers around Carrie’s upper arms. “ I just hope you know what you’re doing letting those two stay.”
“Barry,” Carrie turned her eyes away for a second, the breeze catching the ends of her hair and whipping them around. “ I know the guys have been there a little longer than I had expected them too, but- they really don’t have any where else to go. It’s not safe for them.”
“I’m sorry, Girlie.” Barry patted Carrie’s face gently. “ I know the circumstances, or the supposed circumstances, but-,”
“You think they’re making it up?” Carrie asked, her tone more curious than angry.
“I don’t know.” Barry pushed his glasses up. “ I had an interesting conversation with Leo last night, and it-well, it made my worries resurface. And then after what happened between you and Raph, that whole situation was just-,”
“I told you, Barry,” Carrie took a step back and narrowed her eyes. “Raph and I are past all of that. I’m not letting myself get caught up in something that’s just going to leave me broken again.”
“Hey, I have no say in who you have or don’t have sex with!” Barry held up his hands in defense. “But as long as you are smart enough to stay out of that situation again, that’s fine with me.”
“Final boarding for Manhattan!” A voice boomed over the intercom above them. “Final boarding!”
“Well, gotta run, Girlie!” Barry bent down and replaced his bags on his shoulders. “Hope you make it down to the city sometime. We’ll go have dinner and see a show, how’s that sound?”
“Wait!” Carrie grabbed Barry’s elbow, pulling him back down from the bus steps and causing the boarding passengers around them to yell and cuss. “Why did you say that talking with Leo made your worries resurface?”
“ Mister, are you gettin’ on or what?” The driver called from the doors as the last passenger climbed the steps.
“Just hang on a second!” Carrie yelled back, sending the driver back into his seat with a angry scowl on his reddening face. “What did you mean?”
Barry looked longingly at the soft navy head rests above the bus seats, his brain pounding from his rough night of sleep. But after seeing the puzzled expression on Carrie’s flushed face, he give in and climbed back down the steps.
“It’s probably nothing, Girlie.” Barry dropped his bags once again and pulled Carrie closer. “I didn’t mean to scare you. Maybe it was just Leo’s lack of sleep, and that he’s a high-strung pers-uh, turtle. Nothing more, I’m sure.”
“Barry-,” Carrie began to plead, but felt her long time friend slip from her arms and board the bus, taking a seat far in the back away from the rest of the passengers. The bus pulled out short after, and the last thing Carrie could see was Barry’s hand waving out the window.
She stood still for a moment, her gloved hands buried deep in the pockets of her suede coat as the winter breeze grew stronger. A sudden banging noise from above directed Carrie’s eyes to the Christmas lights that hung from the station’s roof, and instead of being filled with a warm sense of the upcoming holiday, Carrie instead felt a sudden dread as Barry’s words circled around in her mind.
“Am I really making a mistake?” Carrie whispered out loud as a few snowflakes hit the ground. “I can’t just make them leave. It wouldn’t be right, no matter what has happened.”
“I know what you could do,” A voice called out from behind her, and Carrie turned to find an elderly man with a large bag of salt in his hands. “ You could stop talking to yerself and get out of my way! That’s why my wife is in the mental hospital! Couldn’t stop talking to herself for five minutes! Crazy old bag!”
Carrie jumped to her left and the man pushed by her, the salt making a small rustling noise as it hit the ground, and the old man babbled on as he made his way down the sidewalk. Carrie felt a small amount of water well up in her eyes, and she quickly pushed it back as she crossed the empty streets to her SUV.
*************
Raphael pulled his hands back and glanced at his cracking knuckles as a tiny amount of blood was beginning to pool out.
“Man, I miss my bag.” He glared at the hay bail that hung from a rope that connected to the loft above. “This damn thing ain’t cuttin’ it!”
Across the barn, Leonardo rubbed at his eyes, but quickly moved his hands back to the microphone as the static on the radio popped loudly. Raphael looked at the back of Leonardo’s head, and not wanting to be ignored, he made his way over to his brother and shoved his bleeding hands in Leonardo’s face.
“Look at this shit, Leo!” Raphael purposely whined. “How’s a guy supposed ta get any trainin’ done with that piece of crap?”
Leonardo narrowed his eyes and sighed. He slowly turned his head up to Raphael and a low growl erupted from his throat as he answered in a slow, cold tone.
“ Why don’t you go make another one instead of suffering like an idiot?”
Raphael wrinkled his nose at Leonardo’s response. “Geesh, sorry to interrupt your ‘happy time’ over here.” He backed away and went back to punching the hanging hay bail despite the pain in his hands. Every few minutes, Raphael would glance back at Leonardo, his shoulders hunched over the radio like a vulture guarding an animal carcass, and Raphael knew he had to do something to pull his brother away from his growing obsession.
“Ya know what I helped Carrie do this mornin’? It would have been right up yer alley!” Raphael stopped punching the bail, waiting for Leonardo to respond, but nothing came. “She made help her sort though her pictures so she could organize her photo albums! I gotta tell ya, I thought I was gonna fall asleep! It was borin’ as Hell!”
Still no response.
“Ya know what was even worse-,” Raphael forgot the hay bail and walked back toward Leonardo. “ Carrie’s as anal as you are when it comes ta cleanin’! Everythin’ gotta be just so, or she fuckin’ freaks! I moved things around just ta see her go berserk!”
Leonardo then suddenly turned sharply, his tired, red eyes large with a hint of annoyance. “Then why do you even try to be friends with her then? You obviously don’t care about the things that are important to her, so why do you even bother with it?”
“Man, what the fuck is wrong with ya?” Raphael yelled back. “You’ve been actin’ like a psycho ass ever since we got here! All uptight and shit! Even worse than ya were back home!”
“Oh, I’m sorry! Does it bother you that I’m the only one who has been trying to find our family?” Leonardo jumped up from the stool and moved into Raphael’s personal space, not caring that his brother’s hands were slowly clinching into fists.
“Does it bother you that I have been giving up endless days of sleep because you would rather spend time doing ‘pointless, boring stuff’ with Carrie than help me?”
Raphael took a step back, trying his hardest to hold back from pouncing on his brother. “Hey, I’ve been doin’ shit too, ya know!”
“Like what, Raph?” Leonardo crossed his arms over his chest plates, then pointed to Raphael’s Shell Cycle. “Your bike? You haven’t touched the damn thing in a week!”
“Why does this all the sudden matter ta ya, anyway?” Raphael raised his hands to the sky. “A while back, ya told me we havta stay here cause it ain’t safe anywhere else! Now all the sudden, ya wanna get the Hell outta here when we don’t even know where the others are!” Raphael sighed heavily and shook his head. “Yeah, that’s real fuckin’ smart when Bishop’s out there lookin’ for us! And how do ya know he hasn’t found ya on that damn radio, anyway?”
Leonardo stared down Raphael, their eyes locked together in a battle to see who would give in first.
“You know what, just forget it, Raph. I don’t need your help, nor do I even want it anymore! I can see where your interests lie, and they are not with finding our family.”
“What the fuck-,” Raphael began, but stopped when Leonardo moved away from their staring contest and sat back down at the radio. “Wait a minute. Wait a fuckin’ minute!”
“I’m done talking about this with you, Raph.” Leonardo waved his hand at his brother without looking up. “Just go do... whatever. I don’t care anymore.”
Raphael let his narrowed eyes stare at the back of his brother’s head again, then he whipped around the table and leaned over the radio.
“This is cause of Carrie, ain’t it?”
Leonardo closed his eyes and sighed. “Raph, I told you, just-just leave.”
“It is!” Raphael jumped back and slammed his hand on the radio, the metallic bang echoing around the barn. “I get it now! Yer fuckin’ pissed cause Carrie’s not mad at me anymore!”
“No, I’m not!” Leonardo argued.
“Yer pissed cause she’s askin’ me ta do all this borin’ shit with her instead of you now!”
“Raph, I’m warning you,” Leonardo growled through his grinding teeth.. “Knock it off.”
“Yer jealous!” Raphael shouted and stomped around Leonardo. “For once, yer actually jealous of me! Man, what would Master Splinter think about all of this? The star pupil ain’t supposed ta be jealous of anyone! It’s against his code of honor!”
“Raph-,” Leonardo took a deep breath, his fingers flexing in and out as his anger boiled deep down inside of him. “Why can’t you grow up and stop competing with me?”
“Oh, no, Leo!” Raphael wagged his index finger in his brother’s face. “This ain’t about competin’ with ya! This is about the fact that I was the one who got Carrie first! Yer jealous cause I fucked her first, and I was able ta be friends with her afterwards! Which was somethin you couldn’t do with-,”
“Don’t!” Leonardo stood up and moved back to his brother, his tense body shaking.
“ Don’t you dare say her name! We agreed to never discuss her again! And that was a completely different circumstance, Raph! You know it was!”
“Whatever, Leo!” Raphael rolled his eyes. “The fact is that you are pissed cause I was able ta do somethin’ that you couldn’t!” He then turned his back to Leonardo and smiled. “I bet yer also mad cause ya thought that I couldn’t do it! Yeah, I bet ya thought, there’s no way in Hell Raphael could be friends with someone he had sex with! The concept is just beyond belief!”
As Raphael walked away, his laughter ringing throughout the barn, Leonardo held his fist together tightly, his slow-to-rise anger rupturing every point in his body. His breaths came out in staggering puffs. His vision, blurred from his lack of sleep, saw nothing but red as he moved quickly behind his brother.
“Ya know, Leo,” Raphael stopped walking, the sarcasm still present in his tone. “ This never would have happened if you hadn’t taken the chance I gave ya. I let ya have a go at Carrie, but bein’ the wussy nice guy ya are, ya lost yer chance. I gotta tell ya though, ya missed out on-,”
His words were cut short as Leonardo leap through the air with a raging scream and slammed Raphael down to the barn floor. Raphael pushed back, his short temper quickly responding to the threat, and he managed to grab Leonardo’s arms and flip his brother over his head. Leonardo regained his footing, just as Raphael stood up, and he rushed back, burying his head into Raphael’s stomach, sending him back down. He straddled Raphael’s chest, his closed fists coming within inches of his brother’s face before Raphael grabbed Leonardo’s wrists and held them back with all his might.
“How can you be the way you are?” Leonardo screamed, his fists still trying to meet with Raphael’s face. “You make me fucking sick! You have no respect for anyone!”
“Get the fuck offa me, Leo!” Raphael exclaimed. “I’m fuckin’ warnin’ you!”
“No! I’m warning you, Raph!” Leonardo managed to slip one of his wrists free and instead punched at the still tender scar in the middle of Raphael’s chest plates. “Stop treating Carrie like a whore, or I’ll-,”
Raphael winced in pain as Leonardo delivered another blow to his old wound, and quickly regained his hold on Leonardo’s wrist before another hit was made. “Or you’ll what, Leo? Just exactly what do ya plan on doin’ ta me?”
Raphael shoved his knee into Leonardo’s gut, stopping his brother from continuing his threat, and he pushed his brother backwards. As Leonardo lay on his side, his shell aching in pain from the slide across the floor, Raphael slowly stood, his hands holding onto the scar tissue that had grown over his wound.
“Ya got some nerve, Leo.” Raphael took in a deep breath and shook his head. “Tellin’ me I gotta fuckin’ grow up. At least I didn’t fuckin’ attack ya over some chick!”
Leonardo said nothing, just stared Raphael down as he propped his body up with his elbow and tried to regain his breath.
“Why is Carrie such a big deal ta you anyway?” Raphael asked, cautiously taking a step closer to his brother. “ And why are ya givin’ me so much shit about it?”
Raphael bent down, his anger vanishing into nothing, and he looked deeper into his brother’s raging brown eyes.
“Are ya....in love with her, Leo?”
Leonardo turned away and jumped to his feet. He brushed off the strands of hay and patches of dirt off his body and sat back down at the radio, pretending to busy himself with the dials while pushing back the tears in his eyes. Raphael remained still, but couldn’t help pushing his theory on his brother again.
“Leo, if that’s the case, then I’ll step-,”
“Raph, just leave.” Leonardo spoke in a hushed voice, his eyes remaining on the radio. “I need-I need to be alone.”
Raphael lowered his eyes to the ground and turned around, knowing that it was best to heed his brother’s wishes instead of egging him on again. After opening the barn doors and seeing the lights on in Carrie’s house through the blizzard of snow, Raphael took one last look at Leonardo, then closed the barn doors behind him.
Upon closing the back door that lead into the kitchen, Raphael wiped the snow from his feet on the green and white ivy rug and watched as Carrie hurried around, a wooden spoon in one hand and balancing an open cookbook in the other. She zipped from the herbs growing in the window to the steaming pot on the stove, then to the refrigerator to gather a few fresh stalks of celery, then back to stove. Raphael was becoming increasing dizzy as he watched Carrie scurry about, and he tried to sneak past the bustling blonde to make for the living room, but was caught before his left foot was able to hit the carpet of the dining room.
“I’m so sorry I was late getting back!” Carrie set down the cookbook and spoon, and wiped her hands with her apron. “The roads are getting really nasty! I was doing like five miles per hour on the main road coming out here!”
Raphael forced out a smile, but suddenly winced at the ache in his abdomen and once again failed at hiding himself from Carrie’s observing eyes.
“ Oh my- what happened to you?” Carrie pried Raphael’s fingers back, squatting down to look over the wound. “What did you do to it?”
“It’s nothin’. I just- just... fell, that’s all.” Raphael pulled Carrie back up to her feet and gently pushed her back. “I’m fine.”
Carrie raised a blonde eyebrow to Raphael’s unusual quiet tone of voice and her hands balled up on her hips. “You fell? What did you fall from?”
“I told ya, it’s nothin’!” Raphael suddenly snapped, but shook his head when he saw the hurt in Carrie’s face. “I’m sorry. I’ve...had a bad day. I just wanna sit down.”
He staggered through the dining room to the living room, sighing heavily as he plopped down on the couch. Raphael pulled his bandanna down, leaving it to rest on around his neck, then folded his hands across his eyes and hoisted his feet up to the coffee table, grateful for the warmth of the fire that burned twenty feet away. He finally allowed his body to relax, letting out another long sigh, but stopped when he caught the scent of Carrie’s rose body spray. He yanked his hands down just as Carrie came around the corner with a flat, long package in her hands.
“Here. This is for you!” Carrie announced with a giant smile as she placed the package in Raphael’s unsuspecting hands.
Raphael blinked twice at Carrie, then stared at the green paper covered with snowmen. “What the hell is this for?”
“It’s your Christmas present.” Carrie blushed, then shrugged as Raphael pushed his brows together. “I wanted to give it to you now. You know, just in case you guys leave before Christmas.”
“Okay...” Raphael turned the package up on its side, becoming startled when the contents inside rattled.
“Just open it!” Carrie demanded, smacking Raphael’s shoulder. “I promise it won’t bite!”
“Okay, okay! Shit!” Raphael leaned forward, dropping his feet from the table, and jabbed his finger under the tape. After getting the wrapping off, he ripped off the top of the long, white box, and tossed back the tissue paper, only to stare in disbelief at what laid inside the box.
“I don’t-how-where-how did ya-,” Raphael reached down and enclosed his fingers around the cold steel of his prized twin sais. He breathlessly held one of them up, his thumb rubbing the red cloth handle, then traveling down the curved side prongs. Even though he still couldn’t believe his own eyes, a smile broke through his sour expression as Raphael found all the nicks and scratches from the years of use, knowing that these really were his beloved weapons.
“Where did ya find them at?”
Carrie scooted closer to Raphael and brought her legs up on the couch. “ A few weeks ago, I was out posting up those ‘No Trespassing’ signs around the property, for the hunters, and I found one sticking out of a pile of brush. I didn’t really know what it was, but I picked it up anyway. The other was a few feet from the first, and it was lodged in a tree trunk.”
“I lost ‘em when Bishop took that shot at us,” Raphael replied without looking up from the sais. “Must have fallen out of my belt when the bike slammed inta me.”
Carrie smiled bigger at the happiness that poured from Raphael’s face.“Well, I didn’t know they were even yours until the other day when the three of us were watching that Bruce Lee marathon on T.V. Remember? That guy in-shit, what movie was that? He had a pair of those.”
“Fists of Fury.” Raphael laughed. “Yeah, I remember. Depressed the hell outta me.” He looked over at Carrie, feeling a slight blush come over his face. “I don’t know what ta say. I-shit, I didn’t expect this. Ya really made up for my shitty day, Carrie. Thanks.”
“No problem.” Carrie patted Raphael’s shoulder, then pointed down at the weapons. “ Are you going to teach me how to use them?”
“No way, sister!” Raphael pulled the sais out of the box and held them against his chest. “If ya buy yer own, then maybe. But ya ain’t touchin’ mine!”
“Well, that’s not fair!” Carrie folded her arms and lowered her bottom lip. “Leo’s letting me use his swords!”
“Yeah, well, I’m a greedy, selfish bastard.” Raphael joked, still hugging the weapons. “I hope ya ain’t expectin’ a gift in return from me. I’m a little short on cash this holiday season.”
Carrie laughed, then stood as Raphael did, watching intently as he spun both weapons around in his hands, like a drummer spinning his drumsticks. In a quick flash, the sai came to a sudden stop, the middle prong sticking out between Raphael’s fingers, the handles resting comfortably on the insides of his wrists. Raphael watched Carrie eye the weapons, then grinned as he got an idea to mess with her.
“Tell ya what, if ya can grab these outta my hands, I’ll teach ya how ta use them.”
Carrie’s smile disappeared as her grey eyes grew wide in shock. “Are you kidding me?”
“Nope!” Raphael laughed again. “Come on! I wanna see how good Leo’s been trainin’ ya.”
“He hasn’t been training me.” Carrie took a step closer to Raphael, accepting his challenge. “He’s been showing me some basic self-defense moves. Something I can use on my ex if he ever comes near me again.”
“Like anyone would be afraid of you!” Raphael remarked, chuckling as Carrie’s eyes narrowed. “Yer too cute and petite ta been takin’ seriously!”
He took a sidestep, then another, and soon the two were circling around in the middle of the living room. Carrie suddenly dashed forward, and Raphael took a step to his left, but found Carrie had wrapped her arms tightly around his waist.
“Okay, what the hell is that?” He looked down and shook his head. “ What are ya goin’ do? Pick me up and throw me?”
Carrie looked up, an evil grin on her face. “No. I’m going to do-this!”
She then shoved the tips of her fingers deep into Raphael’s sides, causing him to explode in fits of laughter. His grasp on the twin sais loosen, and they fell to the floor, but the struggle for the weapons was forgotten as Raphael grabbed Carrie into his arms and slammed her down on the couch, holding her back as his fingertips returned the punishing tickles to her sock-covered feet. Carrie pounded her fists against Raphael’s shell, tears running her face as she gulped for air between her belly laughs.
“Had enough yet?” Raphael called out over Carrie’s cackling. “Ya give up?”
“No-never!” Carrie cried back.
“Suit yerself!” Raphael then turned around and attacked Carrie’s sensitive sides, his fingers digging deep into her ribs as she thrashed around under him. “About now?”
“Okay! I give! I can’t breath!” Carrie screamed through her laughs, her face glowing as red as Raphael’s bandanna. She brushed her hair from her face, smiling stupidly up at Raphael as he too regained his breath from his own laughter.
In that moment, Carrie felt as if time had slowed down around her as she stared in Raphael’s eyes, seeing for the first time a new kind of happiness reflecting in them. Her heart throbbed, melting into a puddle with every beat, and without giving it any thought at all, Carrie suddenly reached up and wrapped her arms around Raphael’s neck, pulling him down closer to her. Before Raphael knew what had happened, Carrie pushed her full lips against his, wanting and hoping that Raphael would kiss her back. He quickly pulled away, his brown eyes wide in shock, and he pushed his body away from Carrie to the corner of the couch.
Carrie sat up, then crawled over to where Raphael sat huddled against the arm of the couch.She placed her finger to his lips, signaling him not to speak or make a sound, and Carrie directed his hands around her waist as she moved her own arms back around his neck.
“Please, Raph.” Carrie said softly with a tear in her eye. “ Just kiss me. That’s all I need.”
Raphael gulped loudly, unaware that his eyes were still large, and was suddenly more concerned that his brother would walk in on them than the blonde who only sat inches from his face.
“Carrie, I don’t think we should do this.” Raphael whispered, only to be quieted again by Carrie’s index finger.
“Please,” Carrie pleaded again. “I just need to know something.”
“Well, couldn’t I just tell ya-,”
“No, not from you, Raph.” Carrie leaned in closer, the heat of her breath hitting Raphael’s mouth. “I need to do this for myself.”
Raphael soften his worried face, searching deep through the mist of tears in Carrie’s eyes to find the answer behind her strange request, but as he stroked Carrie’s flushed cheek with his thumb, he soon realized there was something that he had to find out for himself as well.
Without another word, Raphael pulled Carrie’s mouth to his and parted her lips with his tongue. Carrie pushed back, their tongues wrestling for complete control over the other. But while their mouths fought against each other, neither one moved the positions of their hands, both of them knowing that there something suddenly more important than rekindling their past actions. The passionate kiss lasted only a few minutes, but as they pulled away and rested their foreheads together in a breathless, giggle-fest, Carrie and Raphael both felt relieved, knowing once and for all that they had found the answers they were looking for.
A pop over the airwaves snapped Leonardo out of his slumber and his head shot up from the sudden sound. He yawned, rubbed at his eyes, then blinked at the glare from the green power button. He moaned at the ache that sat behind his eyes, then lowered his head back to the table’s cold surface.
“Why are you doing this?” He asked himself. “You’ll never find them. Raph’s right. It’s a lost cause.”
His finger rose to the power button, but stopped short from cutting the power as the static popped again and a voice poured out from the speaker.
“Yeah, this is HockeySticks, signalin’ out ta anyone who might answer by the name Fearless Leader. Come on Fearless Leader. We know yer out there!”
Leonardo blinked once, then twice, and again rubbed at his eyes as his mouth dropped in shock.
“No way. It-It can’t be.”
“Yeah, we’ve been broadcastin’ for....a month now. Just wanna let ya know, Fearless Leader, that everyone is alive and doin’ good. So, if ya can hear me, I repeat, everyone is alive. Come and find us up at Grandma’s. Hockeysticks over and out.”
“Wait! Wait!” Leonardo cried as the receiver bounced around in his hands. After getting a tight grasp on it, Leonardo pushed down on the button and spoke in a hurried pace.
“Casey! Wait! Don’t sign off! I can hear you!”
The static popped again, and after a minute of silence, the deep New York accent returned to the radio.
“Who is this?”
“It’s me.” Leonardo sighed in relief, but winced at the CB name Casey Jones had given him. “It’s...Fearless Leader. I hear you loud and clear, Hockeysticks.”
Another moment of silence, then Casey’s voice came back. “Leo? Holy shit, man! Is it really you?”
“Yes, Casey,” Leonardo’s head slumped back down to the table, a satisfying smile washing over his tired face. “ It’s me. You have no idea how good it is to hear your voice again.”
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Writings of the Heart