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Reading Minds	By : SAMVAN Category: DC Verse Cartoons - Teen Titans > Het Views: 5986 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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I have made a decision to do something I promised myself never to do. Since I’m keeping this stupid diary anyway, I figured I should make it truthful. I get so pissed off at the outrageous behavior of my teammates, sometimes. They can be so immature. And I know that everyone (myself excepted, of course,) is constantly saying things they don’t mean.

All the people in this city think it’s so cool to be a Teen Titan. They think it’s so great that we are all good friends, that we always help and support one another. Everything is always coming up roses for us.

Well, I was thinking-if we are so popular, perhaps someday, someone will want to make our adventures into a comic: or even a TV show! If that ever happens, I will be able to present them with the real scoop on the Titans-what they are really like; what we really think.

I am going to read their minds. We’ll see just what Robin really thinks of Beastboy’s ridiculous antics. What Cyborg really feels about Robin being the self-appointed leader. What Starfire thinks about-what does she think about?

Anyway, starting today, we shall see who the real Teen Titans are…

Monday-1/25/05

A few ‘interesting’ revelations before I even made it down to the kitchen. BB was pleading with Star to let him use the bathroom, even though he knew she always showers in the morning.

A few of his (admittedly) random thoughts. ‘I hope she comes to the door without her towel again.’ ‘I bet Raven has nicer tits, though.’ ‘Can’t wait to kick metalhead’s ass in Robo Racers today-he’ll never figure out how I rigged his controller.’

Downstairs, Cyborg was making breakfast. Robin was sitting at his ‘crime computer,’ of course. I went to make my usual herbal tea.

Cyborg greeted me: “Hey, Raven-what’s shakin?’
Thought: ‘How the hell can she live on that crap? Stuck-up whiner- always refusing to eat breakfast with us.’

Me: (I guess I should be fair.) Hey, Cy.
Thought: ‘Fuck off! Would it kill you to think to boil a pot of water for my tea?’

Robin: Oh, hi Raven.
Thought: ‘I gotta find Slade before someone else does. That’ll show those other dumb-asses, when I’m right, again. I am so cool, heh heh.’

Me: Hi, Robin.
Thought: ‘If you were so freakin’ smart maybe you would notice that Starfire is dying for you to fuck her brains out.’

Starfire and Beastboy came down for breakfast at almost the same time. Gee, I wonder why?

Beastboy said ‘hi’ to everyone. Starefire ‘greeted’ each of us individually, as is her habit.

Beastboy: I only smell meat cooking. Aren’t you making me anything?
Thought: ‘Asshole!’

Cyborg: “No. How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t do that Tofu crap?”
Thought: ‘I bet he wishes he could kick my ass-ha ha.’

Beastboy: “Thanks for being so thoughtful, as usual.”
Thought: ‘I am so gonna kick his ass, someday…’

Starfire: “Friends, please do not fight.”
Thought: ‘Friends, please do not fight.’ (Well-now we know.)

Beastboy and Cyborg, having given Starfire’s plea due consideration, proceeded to yell and scream and threaten one another, as usual.

Robin: “Can’t you guys just get along like the rest of us?”
Thought: ‘Idiots.’

My thought: ‘Idiots.’

Starfire thought: ‘Fluffy clouds-pink, fluffy clouds.’

Well, you get the idea…

Sat around reading after breakfast. The two ‘mental giants’ played video games. Robin went to train-just to be different. (I’m sorry. In case you didn’t know-that was sarcasm.) Starfire stayed to pester me.

No use reading the boy’s minds-nothing in their minds but a constant stream of expletives, as they each try to out-do the other at ‘cheating.’ Excuse me-I mean ‘winning.’

Starfire: Raven? Do you think that Robin will ever ask me to-um-kiss?
Thought: ‘kiss me all over my naked body…’

Me: “What color underwear do I have on?”
Thought: ‘Tamarand-Cutie-Pie-Slut.’

Starfire: “Umm, I don’t know, Raven.”
Thought: ‘Does she not know?’

Me: “See, you just answered your own question, Star. Now may I read in peace?”
Thought: ‘Go away now…’

Starfire: “I am confused…”
Thought: ‘…Grobnag (Bitch)…’
Starfire: …”friend. But I shall respect your wishes, and leave you, now.”

A little later that afternoon we got an alert. It seems some ‘supervillian’ moron had moved from Gotham to Jump City-looking for greener pastures, I suppose. Calls himself ‘Venom.’

Robin: “Titans, go!”
Thought: ‘I am so cool.’

Starfire thought: ‘…so cute…’

Cyborg thought: ‘I should be the leader, instead of that lame-ass pantywaste.’

Beastboy Thought: ‘How come wonderboy always gets to say ‘Titans go?’’

My thought: ‘Ugh! So sick of hearing that…’

As usual, Starfire and I arrived at the scene first, followed by Beastboy. The testosterone twins had to take their respective ‘rides.’

Venom wasn’t trying to steal anything, just causing general mayhem-and a few deaths. No big. I trapped him in an energy-bubble. Mission accomplished. Yay, me.

Starfire: “Friend Raven-that was well done!”
Thought: ‘for once. Where is Robbie-Pooh?’

Beastboy: “Hey! I didn’t even get to do anything!”
Thought: ‘-at least I didn’t get my ass kicked again…’

Robin and Cyborg finally arrived. The wonderbird felt it necessary to interrogate ‘his’ prisoner.

Robin: “Why did you leave Gotham? What are you doing in my-er-our city?”
Thought: ‘Cool suit man!’

Venom: “Everyone there is ganging up on me-Batman, Spiderman, Carnage, Shreik, the Cops-Dexter, the boy wonder. It sucks being the supervillian that even other supervillians love to hate...”
Thought: “We knew we could pound your punk ass-we didn’t know about the goth chick with the magic shit. Hmmm…maybe we should leave this loser, and switch…”

Robin instructed Beastboy to summon the police, and escort Venom to his new 'home.'

Beastboy: “Why do I have to?...”
Thought: 'Why do I have to?...”

Robin: (frowning)
Thought: 'It's so cool being the leader...'

Cyborg: (laughing) “Cause you’re the little green one.”
Thought: 'Why don't you tell Robin to fuck himself, pussy?'

Beastboy: “Why don't you go stick your finger in a light socket-you're not so bright, lately.”
Thought: 'I should tell him and Robin to go fuck themselves-and then kick their asses. Why can't I be more like Raven? She wouldn't take this shit.’

My thought: 'Hmmm-I guess BB has some sense, after all. Or good taste, at least…'

Starefire: “I will help, friend Beastboy...”
Thought: 'Pink fluffy bunnies...'

Flight home uneventful. Starefire still thinking 'Candyland' thoughts.
Went to my room for awhile. Cyborg headed straight to the refrigerator, of course.

Robin said he was going to train.
Thought: 'Dammit-who the hell does Raven think she is, starting without me? Must kick the crap out of something...'

Starefire knocked on my door.

Starfire: “Ummm, Raven-would you consent to talk to me now-”
Thought: '...thought you were my friend, bitch.'

Starfire: “...about friend Robin and the kissing?”
Thought: '...and explain why you want me to examine your underwear?'

Me: “Yeah-whatever.”
Thought: '-so you still didn’t figure that one out, eh, Sherlock?'

Starefire: “I am afraid that Robin may never ask me to perform the kissing. He always makes excuses whenever we seem to be getting-uh-close?”
Thought: 'I am so freakin' horny! I wonder if friend Cyborg has a penis?'

Me: “Ummmmmmmmm...”
Thought: 'Whoa-shit!-didn't see that coming...'

Me: “Uhhh-I think you're just going to have to initiate 'the kissing' yourself, Star. Robin is kinda shy, I think.”
Thought: “Or gay-or stuck on himself-or obsessive or...”

Starfire: “???????” (blank stare)
Thought: ‘blank stare.’

Me: ‘Next time you feel-uh-‘close,’ just put your lips on his…”
Thought: ‘do I really have to draw you a picture?’

Starfire: “Like this?”
Thought: ‘I like her, too-and she said just do it…”

Suddenly, Starfire grabbed the back of my head and kissed me!
My thought: ‘Ahhhh! My room is a freakin’ mess!’

Starfire: “friend Raven? Is that what they mean in the movie pictures, when they say 'the Earth moved?’
Thought: ‘hee hee. That was fun!’

Me: “Star, please don’t ever do that again.”
Thought: ‘-before we go to someplace safe, like the moon, where I can fuck your brains out.’

Starfire pouted: “Was I not a good kiss for you?”
Thought: ‘What were we talking about…?’

Me: “No-It’s not that, Star. I-just think that Robin and you have kind of been a pair for awhile, now. I think you owe it to him to give him a chance…”
Thought: ‘It’s for the good of the team-right? He would flip out, losing his girlfriend to me…’

Starfire: “Oh, I see, Raven. I shall talk to Robin, and see if he is wishing to kiss with me.”
Thought: ‘-so confusing-pink, fluffy bunnies-pink, flu-oh! Raven was soooo cute when she was a bunny! No!-must concentrate on Robbie, my Pooh. Sigh-I am so confused…’
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To Be Continued....Review! The brain of Mr. 'S' commands you!
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