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Reviews for Minion

By : Gevaisa

From ANON - beanie_platypus on September 09, 2005
Chap13. You really like flashbacks a lot, don't you? I did end up checking this story out on ff.net, and I'm not sure which I think is better, when the story goes in chronologically straight or when it winds around and reveals the characters slowly. I did like how she handled Toad: I mean, come on, he's TOAD. Taking him seriously is the first sign of mental illness in a fic writer. I look forward to seeing the reprecussions that ensue from this for Jovi and Doom, but don't forget that there was a period of several hours at least where he must have thought she'd betrayed him, paranoid thing that he is. His reaction shouldn't be left by the wayside, unless you want to abandon your duality theme this late in the game.
That aside, I *do* so love her thought processes about the injustice to mutants that Xavier and Magneto both pull off. While X-books do throw in a few helpless victim-type mutants every now and then, for the most part its only so the costumes can save them. They're really lost the sense of hope of the early books... In that vein, you might want to consider what *Doom's* response to mutation in Latveria is. There have to be some mutants there. No doubt he's got something organized and sensible going on, but what?
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From ANON - Nat on September 09, 2005
yea victor has her back happy day! i like the way that jo is a bit of a badass and at the same time a nobel lady keep up the great writing i love this story! :-)
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From ANON - Beanie_platypus on September 08, 2005
I realize this is a little out of the blue, but I just started to take German, so the thought was on my mind... All of the Romance languages, and many other European languages, have formal and informal forms of the pronoun 'you'. So, in German, you don't address your boss with the informal "du" that you use with your friends, you only use the formal "Sie," even if you're just chatting. Same in Spanish, French, etc. Of course, Latverian is a fictional language, so it can follow whatever grammatical rules are convienient for the writer, but it seems like it wouldn't be outside the realm of possibility for Latverian to have to formal/informal you split. Which brings me to my actual question: IF Latverian does have 'in-/formal you', how is Jovi addressing Doom now? I mean, she's still calling him "my lord" at times even now they're gettin' hitched, so it seems likely that the most diplomatic thing for her to do is just continue using a 'formal you' until he asks her to stop, but she *is* mentally calling him Victor.... Alright, a great deal of that was incredibly random, but I just had the thought and wondered if you had considered it.
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From ANON - awoman on September 07, 2005
Hey Gevaisa!

Look, I've found you here, because when I was not able to learn any more, I started reading "Minion" (as you have not updated any of your other stories!) - and though all the characters and the "Universe" are unfamiliar with me, I enjoyed your style and the story so much that I kept reading - and when ff.net did not offer more, I started searching for more - and that was how I came here. ;-)

Is there more to be found on the net from you?

When will you update anything? Until now, I am reading three stories authored by you - and I am curious about all of them.
Still, the sequence you use in ff.net is - to me - better than the sequence here - with beginning at the first meeting and then going on.

I will try now and go back to my books about biliotherapy and its use in religious education of blind children - which is the subject I will probably have to write my last written test about tomorrow morning from nine to one - and I still don't have a clue on what to write. ;-)

Have a nice day and take care of yourself!
Sincere greetings, awoman
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From ANON - Beanie_platypus on September 06, 2005
Chap 12... While you had my unadulterated support before, my love of Sabretooth divides my loyalties on this chapter. On the one hand, smart, cool-headed original character, taking care of business with only the resources at her disposal in a chapter that's way too short, but on the other hand, the return of the "stupid, murderous, sidekick" Sabretooth, good for hacking and slashing but without two grey cells to rub together. Sigh.... Still, its wonderful to see the damage that intellect and common household appliances can work upon an unsuspecting supervillian. But she still has to take care of Toad....
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From ANON - Demos on September 06, 2005
:Chuckles:

Pinesol? Thats inspired :P

Another enjoyable chaptor in a 12 chapter string of them. Erotic or not, this has got to be one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I've read in some time. I boy my hat to you, milady.

And more chapters = Good, No matter when you decide to post them :P
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From ANON - NAT on September 06, 2005
another totally awsome chapter love the way jo uses house cleaning products to her advantage i know it sting when that stuff gets in your eyes X) keep up the great writing and hope to see another chapter up soon hope victor gets a part!
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From ANON - soulshard on September 05, 2005
More terrific chapters, i can't believe how fast you write them ! hmm Joviana helping Doom return from Hades, i assume that you are not a fan of the Unthinkable arc then ? By the way the bit about Mastermind looking like a flasher made me giggle. Her death was very well written i hope we find out how she was brought back to life. I do have one question if i may, would you consider writing more Doom stories in the future?
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From ANON - Beanie_platypus on September 03, 2005
Very, very well done. The scene of Jovi lowering herself into the water is convincing and creepy, and just like everything else you've written so far, shows her as an extremely complex bundle of bravery, confidence and guile. The "because I liked him" part is what convinces me about her: with her sucky past revealed (very sneaky way of getting it into the plot in a convincing first person, btw), Jovi seems like she would be extremely loyal to both her own causes and anyone who was able to secure her respect and affections. The direct messaging to the computer in Doom's armor was a very nice touch! I've never seen anyone do anything with outside access to his armor, and I'd always assumed it would be a closed system, but the idea of access to a chosen few under intense security is far more interesting and with many more possiblities. I do wonder, tho, just how much "consideration" went into Jovi's declaration of love at the end? Again, a winning combination of possible manipulation for her own ends, and possible true sentiments. You're really quite good at this.
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From ANON - Anon on September 03, 2005
Very, very well done. The scene of Jovi lowering herself into the water is convincing and creepy, and just like everything else you've written so far, shows her as an extremely complex bundle of bravery, confidence and guile. The "because I liked him" part is what convinces me about her: with her sucky past revealed (very sneaky way of getting it into the plot in a convincing first person, btw), Jovi seems like she would be extremely loyal to both her own causes and anyone who was able to secure her respect and affections. The direct messaging to the computer in Doom's armor was a very nice touch! I've never seen anyone do anything with outside access to his armor, and I'd always assumed it would be a closed system, but the idea of access to a chosen few under intense security is far more interesting and with many more possiblities. I do wonder, tho, just how much "consideration" went into Jovi's declaration of love at the end? Again, a winning combination of possible manipulation for her own ends, and possible true sentiments. You're really quite good at this.
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From ANON - Nat on September 03, 2005
Totally awsome chapter love the sneakyness of jo and how she was albe to contact victor in time poor dumb toad should not leave door unlocked! keep up the wonderful writing and hope to see another chapter up from you soon!
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From ANON - Demos on September 03, 2005
Nice try :P

I'm checking this thing once aday now :)

The death scene was quite nifty. The coins were a nice touch. Other than that I gotta say this fanfic is just getting niftier and niftier.
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From ANON - Chiyojo on September 01, 2005
Your main character has quite a depressing back story (a believable character makes a FAR better story)- she's certainly handled it well though, especially managing to 'smother' an enemy with negative emotions! It's great the way you've brought in Magneto as well- I always thought he was a far better a match for Doctor Doom (if there can be such thing!!) than the Fantastic Four. Can't wait to see how this episode turns out... and don't forget to feed me some of your mushy smut scenes!!! *flutters eyelids and smiles nicely*
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From ANON - Demos on September 01, 2005
Caught you this time :P

The sideplot with Magneto and Malice is looking quite interesting. I look foreward to finding out how she'll get off the island without Eric finding out.
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From ANON - nat on August 31, 2005
Love the way that you have brought in the x men and magneto in to the picture it changes up the flow of thing i like keep up the great work and hope that victor or the F4 get there for her in time
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