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Reviews for Taken

By : Loreley
  • From ANON - fireinu on April 13, 2005
    I like the story. I can't wate to see what she dus next. will hoo the ded simbeote is ever cum in
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  • From ANON - fever red on March 28, 2005
    Oh, I am back in a big way! Chapter 2 was nasty nice, thank-you. A Carnage solo masturbation scene- it's just what I've always wanted; how did you know? You're starting to make him raunchier and more crude. Sexcellent; that's the Cletus Kasady I know.
    __Sorry to nit-pick, but if you want this to be as good a Carnie fic as possible, you should know that not only does he refer to himself as "I," he is also refered to by others as "he." However, it still makes perfect sense to say "they" watched Laila, since the fic is about the symbiote's mind as well as the man inside it. However, Venom would refer to Carnage as "he." Wierd; I know.
    __You may also want to show his face and body (the human ones) eventually. I think he's damn hot, and as for Venom, Eddie Brock is widely considered to be a hunk. Laila should be pleasantly surprised when and if she discovers that these alien "monsters" actually have fit, muscular, sexy men inside.
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  • From ANON - CarnageJunkie on March 28, 2005
    It's tricky, but a sex scene is possible when keeping Carnage in character. Just think: How would he like it? And the likes... It might help to make your character a little bit more "assertive". And let's hear some arrogant quips, hm? ;) Can't have Carnage without raunchy and rude comedy!

    Otherwise, I adore your writing style. It's descriptive and really brings the reader into the story.
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  • From ANON - fever red on March 27, 2005
    I'm a lCarnage fan, and I write fan-fic with him.
    __To Carnage fans, this is important: he does not refer to himself in plural. Venom does.
    __Carnage has had a lover, Shriek. Once, he kidnapped a female psychiatrist and took her on a tour of the city. He kept porn pin-ups in his cell at Riker's Island. He is highly sexed and would definitely have tried to seduce your OC. There would be NO confusion, no hesitation by him. If she resisted, he would rape her.
    __Venom has also had a lover, Beck. Both symbiotes have been with their hosts long enough to have experienced human sexual practices.
    __Venom and Carnage consider themselves "father" (V) and "son" (C). They HATE one another. Venom will kill any criminal, and tries to protect the innocent. Carnage will kill anyone: man, woman, child. He loves it.
    __I hope this helps, because I like your writing style. I would enjoy this story much more if you brought Carnage into charactor. There is NO reason the syms can't be in charactor AND fuck the hell out of your OC. One easy idea is to have Venom furious that Carnage raped Leila, and seek revenge.
    __I'd also enjoy the story more if you showed us Leila growing up, and let us see her discover that she is "different." This would be more interesting than only telling us. It would let us observe her life and her attitudes, and get to like her...before Carnage shows up. She certainly seems worth knowing. You've sketched out her boldness and it's appealing.
    __Thanks for creating and sharing!
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  • From ANON - Anon on March 27, 2005
    Both
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